The winds of fate
by Avilia
Summary: Post Awakenings story pondering the ramifications of Ferelden's, and Alistair's, discovery of his parentage.  Rated M for themes and content.
1. A good day for hunting

_This is my first attempt at a 'proper' long fanfic. The gorgeous people at the BSN Anders and Nathaniel Howe fan threads are responsible for giving me the confidence to try. This is also my first real attempt at writing an 'Alistair centric' story. The basic premise came out of a question I asked on BSN that was never answered to my satisfaction. "What would happen if Fiona really was Alistair's mother and everyone found out about it?" Hopefully my answer to that question provides some entertainment and not too much frustration ;-)_

_Background to the setting. This is set in the same universe as my "The first" prompt. From an Origins perspective you're dealing with - Alistair and Anora are married and ruling, Loghain took the final blow on the AD and died a hero, Circle annulled, Werewolf curse lifted, ashes pinched but not defiled and Redcliffe village saved. For Awakenings - the Warden from Origins did not take the appointment which was given to an Orlesian warden, everyone recruited, Amaranthine saved, Architect killed. At the time when this story takes place my other fics are finished and Nate is Warden Commander. Hopefully that gives a decent entry point for the story._

_All characters, settings and such belong to Bioware. Any mistakes are mine.  
_

"One ship drives east and another drives west

With the selfsame winds that blow.

'Tis the set of the sails

And not the gales

Which tells us the way to go.

Like the winds of the sea are the ways of fate,

As we voyage along through life:

'Tis the set of the soul

That decides its goal,

And not the calm or the strife."

Ella Wheeler Wilcox

. . .

There was a time when this news would have given Anora nothing but happiness. The perfect tool to use in her quest for the crown. Another time, another life perhaps. Not this time and not this life.

She'd very reluctantly married Alistair at the urging of the Grey Warden Caethes. It had seemed the sensible thing to do. Her doubts about Alistair's ability to rule had faded with time, while he still had that distressing tendency to treat things with levity, he seemed to know when to be serious. He'd proven himself an able student in the art of politics and a satisfactory husband. Very unlike Cailan.

Glancing down at the message, Anora nodded to the courier. "You're dismissed. See that no one hears of this." The threat was implied but understood. He dipped a deep bow and almost ran out of the audience chamber.

Anora nodded to a guard who bowed and came to stand a few steps away. "I need a message taken to Vigil's Keep near Amaranthine. Wait while I write it then send a messenger. It must done quickly."

"Yes, your majesty."

Moving to her desk Anora wrote as much as she dared and after folding the note carefully, applied her personal seal.

"See that this is given only into the hands of Nathaniel Howe. Only him, do you understand me?"

"Yes, your majesty."

After bowing, the guard strode quickly out to do as he'd been instructed.

There was no hope of keeping it secret. The message was clear in that respect. The news had come from the Bannorn. Even if Teagan was sincere in his wish to avoid conflict, it seemed unlikely others would share his views.

How she'd have laughed if told that day at the Landsmeet, that one day, she'd find herself reluctant to do the very thing that would guarantee her the crown.

Walking slowly, Anora thought about her husband. That still sounded so odd. Her husband. Alistair had given her none of the feelings Cailan had, she didn't love him and had never expected to. Nor did he love her. They'd both been clear on that.

They'd shared a bed only once, on their wedding night. Neither of them had wished to repeat the experience. It had been pleasant enough, if a little embarrassing, particularly for poor Alistair. Much to Anora's surprise he'd not taken a mistress, even at her urging to do so. His reaction when she'd suggested it could still make her smile. She assumed his Chantry training was responsible for his moral outrage.

No she didn't love him, not in the way a wife should, but Anora felt no shame in admitting that if she'd had a child, she'd love that child in the same way she'd come to love her husband. Given a choice she'd protect him from this. It was going to cause him pain. The knowledge that he'd been lied to by those he trusted most was going to break his heart. His still so soft and tender heart. Mother-like she wanted to stand between him and the oncoming storm. With that clarity of sight that her father had often admired, Anora knew she couldn't.

The best she could do for her husband was to tell him now and give him the best possible chance to escape. Before the Landsmeet could gather to call for his head. The temptation to slow her steps was strong but if Anora knew nothing else, she knew her duty. To her country and to her husband.

After taking a moment to steady herself, she tapped lightly on the door to Alistair's rooms and waited.

Preoccupied with fastening his armour, Alistair barely glanced up at the knock. "Come in!"

The sound of Anora's voice startled him. It wasn't her usual habit to visit his bedroom. That in itself was enough to tell him whatever she wanted was urgent.

"Problem my dear?"

Anora waved the servant out. "Wait outside." She'd need him soon to fetch Alistair's armour. Not this ceremonial armour he was donning, but his real armour. "I need a moment Alistair."

"Of course. Anything you need." She was distressed about something. Usually Anora had complete control over her expressions, so the very fact that he could tell she was upset, was disturbing. "Has something happened?"

"You could say that. A message from the Bannorn." A brief jolt of cowardice made her want to just hand him the message and leave. She refused. Spine straight she gestured towards the bed. "I'm sorry Alistair, so sorry. You're going to need to sit."

"Sit? Is it Eamon, has something happened?"

"No, not Eamon. Just sit down please. Sit."

Dropping the gauntlet he'd been about to slide on his hand, Alistair did as Anora told him and sat. "Don't drag it out Anora. Bad news is best told quickly."

"Yes. Quickly. I'm unsure how best to say this so perhaps you're right. Just out with it and then we can discuss what comes next."

Alistair waited but Anora just stood there with that worried look on her face. "Anora?"

"I. Received a message, from Bann Teagan. He wanted to warn you, us, that the Banns are intending to call a Landsmeet. They are going to demand you abdicate and call for your execution."

"Execution! Why?"

"Believe it or not Alistair, that was the least painful part of Teagan's message. It appears Arl Eamon lied to you. About who your mother was, is."

"He, what?"

"Your mother wasn't a servant at the Castle, she is a Grey Warden, an Orlesian mage."

"A mage?"

"Yes. Again I'm sorry but that's not what has the Banns in an uproar."

"Tell me."

"Your mother, Fiona, is an elf." He took it well, she thought. Much better than she'd have guessed.

"I see." An elf. A Grey Warden Orlesian elf mage. It was as if the Maker tried to get all the things together in one parent that would cause the most fuss. Alistair knew Anora was right, the rest might be countenanced but not his mother's race. That was not something the Banns or any humans could be convinced to overlook.

"You're taking this remarkably well." He looked up at her. "Or perhaps you're not.'

"I'll wail and moan later I'm sure. There doesn't seem time for it now."

After nodding briskly Anora outlined her plan. "I suggest leaving as soon as possible for Amaranthine. I've sent a messenger to the Warden Commander. It might seem quicker to take a ship from Denerim but, even with the overland journey, I think Amaranthine will be safer."

"Howe? Why would he want to help me?"

"A Howe perhaps, but a Howe with honour. He'll help us." Leaving him for the moment, Anora opened the door and beckoned the waiting servant. "Fetch the King's armour. His old Grey Warden armour. Bring his swords, the darkspawn longswords."

"Yes your majesty." Used to eccentricities of nobles, the servant didn't stop to wonder why the King wanted his old armour, just ran to fetch it as he'd been told.

"Let me help you with that armour." Anora walked forward only to stop when Alistair held his hand up. "Alistair, we don't have much time."

"I'm not going to run away Anora. Whatever this, revelation, brings I'll stand and face it."

"Now is not the time for self-sacrifice. If we wait for the Banns to organise we could face a Civil War. Is that what you want? So soon after the last one?"

"No. Of course not, it just seems, cowardly to run."

"We could have the guard run you through if you prefer? That would seem a sensible way to avoid a drawn out fight."

He was surprised to hear himself laugh. "Careful Anora, that sounded dangerously like a joke."

"It must be your bad influence." Impatient with his need for heroics, she started tugging at the fastenings on his armour. "The servant is fetching your old armour. Much more sensible for a long journey."

"Anora." Alistair held her hands still. "I'd rather die here than run and die a coward."

"Oh for the Maker's sake. Men! Why do you have this need to be heroes? Fine. Die." Throwing her hands up she backed away. "Die and take half of Ferelden with you!"

"You're right. I know you're right. I should run. It just seems wrong somehow. After everything that's happened, now I'm to run?"

"Please Alistair."

He looked at her for a moment or two. His wife and unexpectedly, his friend. Once he might have accused her of being complicit in this but not now. "Do you have some paper? As useless at it might prove, I'll leave a letter of abdication in your favour. I'll also renounce any claim for my heirs. Assuming I have any." She nodded approvingly. "I'll miss you Anora. You've proven a good friend and a better wife than I possibly deserved under the circumstances."

"I was thinking the same of you. We would have done well together, never doubt it."

"We would." Shaking off his mood, Alistair stood. "As someone once said to me, 'off with the armour then'."

"Who said that? Some tavern wench no doubt?" Busy undoing the fastenings Anora was happy to let him distract himself with jokes.

"My fellow Grey Warden in point of fact. Unfortunately she was joking. Ah well. Women. Such fickle creatures you are."

Hearing a soft tap, Anora went to open the door. "Here's your armour my lord. A good day for hunting I think."

"Yes, a very good day."

. . .

"A good day for hunting lads." Crale crouched with his four best men and watched the road below. "Looks to be alone."

"Armed though. Good looking armour too. Could be trouble."

"Still alone Merrick ya coward."

"I'm no coward. Just don't fancy ending my life at the end of some noble's sword."

"He's no noble. No horse for starters and that armour's too well used. Hasn't been cleaned by a fancy servant." Sykes rubbed his chin while he thought about that.

Oddly enough it was that fact that gave Crale pause. "That could mean he's a fighter. Mercenary maybe?"

"Could be. Came into Denerim and now he's off somewhere? Might have coin. Could make it worth the taking the chance." It seemed weeks since Merrick had tasted decent food. If this traveller had coin he'd take any chance to grab it.

"Strange looking weapons. Reckon that means he isn't a noble. They usually have those fancy shiny ones. Not beaten up looking, whatever those things are."

"Vote then lads?" All hands went up and Crale nodded. "Right usual tricks then. Two of us head on, the rest come around the rear.

Knowing their places the five bandits trotted down the hill and split into two groups. Crale took Merrick with him, they'd do the front. Being the smallest their victims often underestimated the danger they presented. Once their three fellows were in place, Crale moved onto the road and approached the oncoming man slowly.

"Ho there." Crale kept his tone friendly. For now. This close he could see the man's armour was well made but worn, as they suspected. That heavy kind the guards wore, but, brown, dulled with dust and dirt.

Alistair stood in a relaxed posture and watched the two men. Bandits. It was an odd thing but every time he travelled anywhere in this armour he'd be accosted by bandits.

"Good day to you." Without need to look he could feel there were others behind him. One mage, how many others he couldn't tell without looking.

"My friend and I were just wondering where you're off to this fine day?"

They might be sent to kill him. Might be, but unlikely, they looked too hungry to be mercenaries. He'd stick with his first thoughts, bandits.

"South." Feeling the mage come close, Alistair hoped sitting in a palace hadn't dulled his skills.

"Odd you're on the North road then, friend." The signal word was 'friend'. At the sound of it the three behind attacked.

The mage first. Even as he turned Alistair, cleansed his attackers of any spells the mage might have on them. Once that was done he threw Holy smite directly the mage. The three bandits were knocked off their feet, giving him enough time to unsheathed his swords.

"Hold!" Crale backed away quickly. "We didn't know ser." A cursed Templar. "We don't attack the Chantry."

"Do I look like a Templar?" Spinning he had the closest bandit headless before he could run. The next died just as quickly. The mage, still struggling to his feet was impaled on the end of his sword.

"Peace, ser, peace. We don't want no trouble."

"Too late for peace." The remaining two backed away in time to his oncoming steps. "Weren't you intending to kill me?"

"Maker save us are you some kind of demon?"

"A demon? No." Feeling the power rebuild, he once again threw Holy smite. The two remaining bandits were hit and fell hard onto the road. A few quick paces and he reached them. The first he killed quickly, then sword raised, he met the eyes of the survivor and said.

"I'm a Grey Warden."

. . .

He'd taken his anger and pain out on the bandits. Disgusted with himself Alistair kicked the last body off the road and into the ditch along the edge. "Stupid." You'd think he'd have learned some self control by now.

The sun was going down, time to find a camping place. He'd best get some sleep, it was going to be a long walk to Vigil's Keep and his meeting with the Grey Wardens.


	2. Every step a journey

The walking hadn't seem so, boring, when the darkspawn were about. They lurked. Alistair missed the lurking. He'd start thinking about ways to enliven the travelling, things like putting nettles in Morrigan's drawers, feeding Fen leftover stew until he'd vomit in Morrigan's pack, slicing the ties on Morrigan's tent. Then the darkspawn would appear from their lurking and attack. Interrupting his planning so that he'd have to start again.

Odd how he missed those days. He'd felt so alone after Ostagar, then Caethes with her brisk good sense had helped him back on his feet. He missed the sense of comradeship that only came with the constant threat of death.

"You're an idiot Alistair." Grinning at the sound of his own voice he shook his head. He was an idiot. He was a day past losing the crown, he'd found out the one man he thought he could trust had lied to him his whole life and finally he was on the run for his life. And what does he think about while walking half way across Ferelden? Morrigan's drawers. Or rather putting nettles in Morrigan's drawers. Because otherwise, ew, no. Yuck.

He knew he was distracting himself but why not? He had the rest of his life to fret. "Fret." Silly word. Leliana was it? Yes he thought it was her. Had told him not to fret so much. Except she'd said it with that accent of hers. "Oh yes the accent. Don't forget that." He'd liked Leliana and not just because of the accent. Despite what Caethes had implied he'd only liked her not _liked _her. Still he wasn't sure he'd have said no. "Hey! Yes I would." No, he wouldn't. "Great, now I can't even win an argument with myself."

Alistair really did know he was distracting himself, trying hard to distract himself, from thinking. Not about the crown, not even about Eamon particularly, but about leaving Anora to face it all. He knew she'd insisted but it seemed cowardly. Realising he'd stopped walking he half turned to look back the way he'd come. She was right, he knew that. If he'd stayed and managed to gather any support, there'd be another civil war. Thousands of deaths just so he could keep his arse on that uncomfortable wooden seat.

Shaking his head he faced North and walked.

Anora would be a good ruler. She might be a little too rational sometimes, when he thought some heart was needed, but she was fair and only wanted the best for Ferelden.

"For Ferelden." His lips lifted in a grin. She should have that tattooed on her rear end. With fancy scroll work and a small picture of her father. If he ever found the time he must sketch it and send it to her.

He would miss Anora. His friend for the past few years and oddly a sister of sorts. After their, best forgotten, wedding night, they'd settled into an amicable partnership that he'd come to value.

He supposed she'd have the marriage set aside by the Chantry. He hoped she did it quickly. She'd need to present the picture of Loghain's daughter, not Alistair's wife, if she wanted to win the Banns' support. They should support her. They had no reason not to. He was gone and without him there was no reason to fight. Hoping he wasn't deluding himself, Alistair hitched his pack and kept walking.

It was too late now but Alistair was sorry he hadn't taken Zevran up on his offer of a tattoo. Something dashing and Grey Wardeny. He chuckled softly, Grey Wardening, who'd said that? Oh that Templar on the Lake Calenhad docks. That seemed so long ago now.

Grey Warden. Finally his mind settled firmly and refused to let him distract it. Why had he said that? "I'm a Grey Warden".

"Heh and I'm the Queen of Antiva!"

Alistair laughed. Yes, good idea to walk along talking to yourself on a busy road. "You're not even female!"

"I could be!"

He grinned watching the farmer on the bullock cart pull further away from him. Perhaps travelling alone wasn't as boring as he'd thought. He was alone only in that he had no permanent travelling companions. The Pilgrim's Path was always busy with travellers. Merchants on their way to Vigil's Keep and Amaranthine and the odd family on the move. Some other lone walkers like him, on their way to find work perhaps or making their slow way home.

Why had he said it? Hadn't he declared loudly and firmly that he wasn't a Grey Warden? That the Order had tainted itself by accepting Loghain? Tainted itself. Chucking at his own inadvertent joke, Alistair walked on.

He had abandoned them when they needed him the most.

All humour gone Alistair faced the question he'd avoided since the Landsmeet. Had he done the wrong thing? Should he have accepted Loghain's recruitment? How could he? If he'd known killing the Archdemon meant a Grey Warden died, would that have made a difference?

Probably not. He believed Loghain needed to die for what he'd done. He had died, that was true, but he'd died a hero. In some ways that was more unforgivable than his being a Grey Warden. A cursed hero. After what he'd done. Torn the country apart at the worst possible time because he couldn't get his mind out of the past.

"Its done." Yes it was done and finished. Loghain died a hero and Caethes had survived. Possibly the only good thing about the whole mess. Without Loghain she would have died. Frowning Alistair shook his head. No, he would have died, not her. There is no way in Thedas he would have let Caethes die if he'd been up there with her. Absolutely no way.

Which brought him back to his original thought. Why had he said that to the bandit? Because it didn't matter what he'd said back then, its what he was. Not Maric's bastard, not a Templar and certainly not King. It was the only place he'd ever felt safe and at home and as if he was with family. The Wardens.

"I'm a Grey Warden."

He'd said it because its what he was and all he wanted to be.

"You off to the Vigil then ser?"

Startled Alistair glanced around and then down. "How did you know?" The young girl pacing alongside him looked him over then nodded firmly.

"You said you were a Warden. You're walking on the Pilgrim's Path. Seemed logical didn't it."

She wasn't as young as he'd thought. An elf. Travelling alone? That was unusual. He knew elves had problems travelling outside the cities and wondered if this one had run away from something. "Very logical."

"Perhaps we should travel together for a bit?"

"Are you in the habit of asking strange men to travel with you. It can't be safe." One of her eyebrows lifted. "What?"

"You're a Warden aren't you ser? You won't hurt me."

"That shows a remarkable amount of faith in someone from an Order full of thieves and scoundrels."

"Which one are you then?" He kept a good pace. Approving of her new companion's nice way of walking, she rested her hands on her belt and paced alongside him.

"Its been a while since I've stolen anything and unfortunately I'm not much of a scoundrel. I must be the odd one out."

"Why unfortunately?"

Alistair glanced down her. Did this cursed elf never smile? A perfectly good joke and she'd nodded seriously as if he'd meant it. "I'm told women prefer scoundrels."

"Truly?"

"From memory the last woman I tried to romance said I was 'cute'. Cute! I mean really, what man wants to hear that?" That still rankled. Cute? That was almost as off-putting as thinking about Morrigan's drawers.

"I wouldn't say you were cute." He looked down at her and she shook her head. "Not at all cute."

"What would you say I am then ser elf?" Finally she smiled. Not much of one but a small lifting of her lips.

"I like that, ser elf." So far he was just as they'd said he was. "I'd say you're too handsome for your own good and just a little bit dangerous." His smile amused her. "You like that?"

"I won't lie and say I don't." Much better than cute. "If we're to travel together perhaps we should share names?"

Nodding she trotted a few steps to keep up. "I know who you are. Just so we're not arguing later about me hiding things. I'm Gwyn."

Alistair jerked to a halt. "You, what?"

"Gwyn." He eyes narrowed. "Sorry, a little joke." They narrowed even further. "I'm the one taking the message to the Commander."

"Read it did you?"

"I'm not taking anything to the Commander without making sure its safe."

"I. See." Shaking his head, he went back to walking.

"I waited for you. Saw those bandits attack you. Nice work with them. Poor bastards didn't stand a chance." His face shifted briefly and Gwyn saw regret. "Not your fault ser, they could see you as well as I could."

"What do you see?"

"Two swords, no shield. Only someone foolhardy or skilled uses two swords. That armour's well made but not polished up, oiled to keep it quiet when you move. Its that dull brown so it doesn't shine in the sun or catch any light at night. Heavy armour not that bulky massive type the nobles wear, let's you move quicker. Not for show then. You wear it as if you've never worn anything else. You're comfortable in it. If they'd spent more time thinking and less time being greedy, they'd be alive and you'd have had one fight less."

"You should be leading an army Gwyn, not running around Ferelden delivering messages."

"I'm a scout ser, not a courier. Queen's guard gave the message to me 'cause I'm one of the Vigil soldiers. Said that meant he could trust me."

"Quite a coincidence."

"Not really ser. Teryn Cousland told the Commander what was happening. The Commander sent me to Denerim to warn you. Bann Teagan's message to the Queen was faster."

"Why would a Howe care what happens to me? We're not exactly friends."

"You're a Warden ser."

She seemed to think that said it all. Which it did he supposed. "Thank you Gwyn." She flushed which charmed him. "I appreciate your help and your company."

"Yes ser."

"You don't have to keep calling me 'ser'. I'm not any kind of noble." Her eyes flicked up to his then back to the road.

"Yes you are."

"I'm not you know. My mother is an elf." Again she looked up and then away.

"You think that makes you less then before?"

"_I_ don't. But what I think doesn't always matter." He'd learned that the hard way.

"In this case is does. Its the only thing that does matter." Gwyn could tell that was new thing for him to consider. "If you don't mind me mentioning it ser, sun's going down."

"Yes, time to find a spot to camp." Veering off the road, he led her a good distance across the flat ground and just up to the tree line. "Can you cook ser elf?"

"I can." Dropping her pack she looked around. "Can you?"

"Oh, a comedian. I was fooled by those big innocent eyes, but now I know."

"Its true, I'm hilarious. Always getting into trouble for it." Frowning she went after a branch and pulled it back to where he was standing.

"You cook, I'll make the fire and set the camp up." Her mouth opened, probably to remind him of their respective stations. "Shut up."

"Yes ser."

. . .

Gwyn put her hand over Alistair's mouth. As expected she didn't need to shake him awake, his eyes opened the instant she touched him. Lifting her fingers to her lips she made a 'shh' gesture. Once he'd nodded she moved back and pointed towards the road, then back behind her to the trees. Again he nodded and rolled to his feet. She took a moment to be impressed with the way he scooped up his pack and bedroll in the same movement before turning to run almost silently into the trees where she'd indicated.

Very impressive for a man in full armour. Following him just as silently she put her back to the tree next to the one he'd chosen.

"Looks like we're too late ser."

They heard a scuffing sound, possibly their camp fire being turned over by armoured boots.

"It does. Curse it. How hard can it be to find one man travelling this road?"

"Sorry ser." It as a new voice. "Seems to be two of them now. See there."

"I see."

Alistair glanced over at Gwyn who shrugged. He supposed she was right, it didn't matter if they knew he wasn't alone.

"How far ahead do you think they are?"

"Not far. Let's get moving, I'd like this finished so I can get home to my wife."

"At least we won't be carting a body with us."

"True. The Arl was clear. Kill him and make sure the body's never found."

Alistair's eyes closed briefly on a spasm of pain. Surely not Eamon? Chancing the men were leaving or preoccupied he leaned around the tree. There was just enough light in the pre-dawn air that he could make out the heraldry on their shields. Moving back he leaned against the tree and took deep slow breaths. A tower on a red cliff. Maker curse it.

They both sat still until the men left and for a short while after that. Once he was sure it was safe, Alistair rolled his bed roll and attached it to his pack before standing.

"Time to move Gwyn." Why? It was the only thing he could think, why?

"Yes ser."

After nodding, Alistair looked around quickly and finding his direction, set out at a brisk pace.

"Vigil's the other way ser, if you'll pardon me saying." Gwyn pointed over her shoulder.

"I know." Alistair didn't look at her, just kept his eyes focused on the way ahead.

"I'm supposed to go back to the Vigil. Commander's orders."

"We'll get there Gwyn, I have a few things I need to do first." He heard her steps skip when she had to hop to keep up.

"Commander's orders."

"You're free to go." She sighed, loudly, which was the first sign of frustration he'd heard from her. "Your decision."

"Where are you going?"

"Those soldiers, that ones looking for me, they're Arl Eamon's men. I'd like to know why he sent them to kill me."

Gwyn could see Alistair's mind was made up. She could argue with him, but it really wasn't her place to do so. There seemed only one thing for it then. "Give me your word we'll go to the Vigil once we're finished with this."

"My word on it Gwyn. I'll go with you to Vigil's Keep."

That would have to do. Gwyn wasn't leaving Alistair alone to face, who knew what, in Redcliffe. "Its the other side of the cursed country ser."

"We'd best hurry then, hadn't we?"


	3. An arrow through the heart

_I'd like to thank all the lovely people who've reviewed the story so far. I hope I can continue to keep you interested in Alistair's journey :)_

_Apologies for the reference to another fic but it didn't make sense to me that Alistair wouldn't ask._

...

Alistair stopped on the edge of the dense line of trees and braced himself. Not against possible danger but against the onrush of memories he knew this place was going to bring. Not all of them bad memories, but more memories of the past than he really wanted right now. He'd managed to push Eamon away, to be thought about only when they rested, but this place was going to be impossible to ignore.

"Ser?"

Gwyn. Glancing down at her he saw she was also staring into the trees. Waiting for orders? He supposed she was. Once that would have seemed strange and frightening, to have her dependant on him to tell her what to do. He was sure she _could_ manage on her own, she'd found him hadn't she, but Gwyn was a soldier and as far as she was concerned, he was in command. Odd how he liked that.

"We'll have to skim around the edge of the forest Gwyn. We've had luck so far by avoiding the highway and if I'm right the humans will avoid coming here as much as possible."

"Yes ser." She'd never been this far south before. "Is that the Brecilian Forest?"

"It is. Last time I was here there were darkspawn and werewolves." He strode forward and saw her do the same.

"Werewolves ser?" Gwyn wasn't sure she wanted to see those.

"They're gone now. It should be safe enough."

"Yes ser." Just as they plunged into the cool darkness she asked. "There are Dalish here aren't there?"

"Most have gone down to the new homelands but I've heard some stayed. Have you met many Dalish?"

"Just two. One of the Wardens is Dalish, Velanna is her name. The other was Caethes. You travelled with her didn't you ser? Oghren told me stories about what you did."

"Oghren did?" He could well imagine. "I'd ignore half of what he told you. Oghren is prone to exaggerate, particularly when he's drunk. Which used to be most of the time."

"It still is ser. The Commander told me you were a hero and we should be proud to have you as our king." Gwyn stopped when he did. "Something wrong?" She scanned the area but couldn't see any danger. "Darkspawn maybe? I can't see anything."

Right now he'd welcome some darkspawn, however unlikely that was these days. "A hero? Me? I think he must have me confused with some other king."

"I don't think so. Caethes was right there and she didn't say he was wrong."

Shaking his head he started walking. "I'm sure they were just entertaining you with exaggerated tales. Caethes was the hero, I was just there to hit things and tell jokes."

"Oh no ser. The Commander doesn't exaggerate." She wasn't quite sure what to make of the way he looked at her. "Ser?"

"Does your Commander know you're in love with him?"

"Ser! I wouldn't. I couldn't. That's. No!" One eyebrow lifted, saying as clearly as words that he didn't believe her. "Well, maybe a little."

"Ah huh." He'd thought so. That much hero worship had to be based on more than duty. "You haven't tried to do anything about it?" She flushed a very interesting shade of red. "What did you do?"

"Nothing ser. I did think about it. That Caethes, she, well. I thought about offering to let the Commander bed me." Gwyn looked up to see how Alistair was reacting but he was watching the path and not her. "But I've not done it before and I couldn't work up the courage."

"Probably just as well. I can't see how it would have ended well." Hearing her say something under her breath, he glanced at her. "What was that?"

"I said, it would have been worth the risk." She just knew he wanted to laugh. Torn between offence at his laughing at her and relief that he'd finally come out of the dark mood he'd been in, Gwyn huffed. "It would have. The Commander's an archer." Holding her hands out she wiggled her fingers. "Nimble fingers." There. She'd made him laugh.

"You're a wicked woman Gwyn and your Commander is the worse off for not seeing what's in front of him."

"Thank you ser."

"You say Caethes and Howe are, involved? I thought she didn't like humans?"

"Its not for me to say."

Alistair had to laugh. "I think that's the first time anyone's told me to mind my own business so politely."

"Thank you ser."

"Now answer my question."

"I'd rather not, if you'll allow me, it really isn't my place. I will say they spent a long time sorting themselves out."

"And?" It was like trying to pry secrets out of Duncan, all nigh impossible. "Did they sort themselves out?"

"They did. You'll see once we get to the Vigil."

"I suppose I will." He looked forward to seeing his friend again. He owed her an apology and more. "Was she well when you saw her last?"

Gwyn hesitated, she didn't like deceiving Alistair, but as she'd said, not her place to talk about it. "She was."

"Alright, alright, I'll stop questioning you."

"Thank you."

This seemed to deep enough in to hide them from the road but not far enough to worry the Dalish. He hoped. "Let's skim the edge here now, keep to the same path as the road."

"I can fetch us some fresh meat for supper. Should be plenty of game about." Gwyn handed Alistair her pack and unhooked her bow.

"Don't go too far in and nothing too large. Remember we'll have to carry it."

"Yes ser."

Standing a moment he watched her run into the trees. If she had blood writing you'd almost mistake her Dalish. City elves weren't usually as comfortable in the wild. He must see what he could find out about how she'd learned her skills.

Hefting her pack in his arms, he started walking. Now he was alone he'd have to work to keep his attention from wandering. His mind wanted to worry over Eamon but he couldn't let it. He needed to stay alert and focused. Gwyn was his responsibility and when they eventually did arrive at the Vigil he had no intention of it being with one of them dead.

"Hold stranger."

Alistair froze. Dalish. Curse it, he'd thought they'd miss them. "I mean no harm."

"That may be true but you're passing our camp. We don't like shems too close to our camp."

Three of them, two hunters and what appeared to be a mage. Lovely. "If you'll allow me to pass, I'll be gone soon enough." The pack slipped and he hitched it up, instantly putting them on guard. Now he had two bows, arrows notched, aimed at his head.

"You'll be wanting to aim those elsewhere." Gwyn walked forward slowly, her arrow aimed at the mage, the lone woman with the two men. "You might kill me, but that mage of yours will die first."

"Gwyn! Lower that now. We're not here to fight."

"But ser."

"Gwyn." He clearly heard her sigh but lower her bow she did. "I apologise."

"No need, your servant was merely concerned for your safety." The sneer was clear in way she said 'servant'.

"Gwyn isn't my servant. We're Grey Wardens." As expected they relaxed slightly, but still appeared suspicious.

"Grey Wardens? A human and a flat ear? Where would you be off to that requires you to avoid the highway?"

"That doesn't concern you. If you'll allow us room, we'll move on and be gone." Alistair was careful to keep his tone soft and polite.

The mage frowned at him. "That one, she isn't a Warden."

"Not yet. I've just recruited her." That seemed to settle the last of her mistrust.

"Let them pass." The mage waved in the direction they'd been travelling. "Safe journey to you Wardens."

"Thank you."

Alistair jerked his head in the direction they needed to go and walked, hearing Gwyn coming behind him. "Don't threaten people who are only defending themselves."

Gwyn attached her bow to the pack then swung it over her shoulders. "You're my commander now and I'm not letting any harm come to you."

"If I'm your commander, then you do what I tell you, when I tell you. Understood?"

"Ser."

"Either we agree on this or you go back to the Vigil now. I need to know I can trust you Gwyn, or else I'll be safer alone." Looking down he saw her mouth was set stubbornly. "Alright then. Go. Tell Howe I'll be there once I've dealt with this." Leaving it at that, Alistair walked away from her, refusing to look back.

Gwyn watched him go. She couldn't agree to that, she couldn't. What if he was in danger and didn't realise? This Arl Eamon that was stirring him up so much, what if he was a danger and Alistair didn't see it until it was too late? But he'd told her to leave and he was in command.

Gwyn turned to face the direction they'd come from and started walking.

. . .

Alistair poked the fire and frowned. What was going on? He'd like nothing more than to believe it was some kind of misunderstanding, but how did you misunderstand something so clearly stated? Eamon had sent those men to kill him. It had happened after he'd left Denerim. Those men hadn't been that far behind him which meant they were sent from the Arl's home in Denerim and not from Redcliffe. Had they gone to the palace first? No. He didn't think they had. How did they know where he'd go?

Standing he paced a few steps back and forth, trying to work it out. "How did they know where I'd go?" I'm a Grey Warden. Maker yes, where else would he go but the Wardens? He really had nowhere else. Once he'd learned about the Banns he couldn't go to Redcliffe so he'd have to go to the Wardens. Particularly if they sent someone to fetch him.

Was Fergus Cousland involved? Gwyn had said he was the one who'd given Howe the information that had sent her to Denerim. How could Eamon know that's how Nathaniel Howe would react? He and the Howes didn't exactly have a happy history. He'd killed Howe's father for Andraste's sake, that should be enough to ensure he'd not be welcome at the Vigil.

"Maker curse it!" This was getting him nowhere. "Why would Fergus Cousland tell Nathaniel Howe about the Banns? Why would Nathaniel Howe send a scout to warn me? Why does Eamon want me dead?"

"Because you're a Warden."

"What? Gwyn?"

"Its because you're a Warden ser. That's why Teryn Cousland told the Commander you were in trouble and why the Commander sent me to fetch you. If that's both because you're a Warden, could the other be too?"

"I don't understand how it could be. I was a Warden before Eamon decided I should be king." Alistair went back to pacing. "And why are you here? Didn't I send you home?"

"Yes ser." Gwyn dropped her pack and sat to watch him pace. "If I could ask something?"

"Ask."

"Well ser, I wondered the whole time I was travelling to Denerim, how did the Banns find out about your mother? Who told them?"

"Of course! I'm an idiot. I was asking the wrong questions wasn't I."

"Did Arl Eamon know?"

Alistair thought about that. "He must have. I was told I was born in his house, that my mother died there giving birth to me." He remembered clearly that day at Redcliffe Castle when Eamon had announced he'd have to stand against Loghain at the Landsmeet. "Teagan knows. Bann Teagan, Eamon's brother. He tried to stop Eamon putting me forward as king."

"Would Teagan tell the Banns about your mother?"

"Teagan? No. Never." He could believe many things but not that Teagan would do something so dishonourable. Odd he had no such problem with Eamon. His problem there was, why? "It wasn't that long ago I'd have said Eamon was as honourable as Teagan. Why is it I don't believe that any longer?"

"I'm thinking, if Eamon wants you dead for some reason, does it matter why? We should go off to Amaranthine and put you on a ship somewhere. Away from here. If we go to Redcliffe you'll be an easy kill for him."

"I'm not running away again." She made a noise similar to the one he'd heard from Anora under similar circumstances. "You don't agree?"

"No ser." Settling herself, Gwyn started skinning the two rabbits she'd killed. "He's got an army. All you have is me."

"I think you underestimate yourself."

Gwyn watched the rabbit quickly losing its skin and wondered what would happen if she threw it at Alistair. Cursed stubborn man. "If I'm the army what are you? The camp follower?"

"Gwyn, I'm stunned. You do have a sense of humour, I'd wondered." He was treated to the noise again. "I'm sorry but I can't run from this. I need to know why Eamon sent those men after me."

"Alright ser. Redcliffe then."

Alistair winced when the rabbit's ribs cracked. Perhaps he'd wait until later to find out why she'd come back. Not that he was afraid of Gwyn, but he'd learned a long time ago it didn't pay to upset a woman with a sharp knife in her hand.

"Rabbit stew?"

"No ser, I'm thinking I'll shove a stick up its behind and roast it slowly over the fire." Leaning over she picked up a stick and waved it at him. "What do you think?"


	4. Swooping is

"Its an odd name for an Inn, ser, that's all I'm saying. Odd."

Alistair was sorry he'd read the name for her. As soon as she'd heard it, Gwyn had started objecting to going in. "This isn't some fairy story your mother is telling you Gwyn, the Inn isn't going to be haunted or infested with demons. Its just a name."

"An odd name." Crouched nearby in the riverbed, they were watching the Inn for soldiers before Alistair went inside. "I'm thinking I'll stay out here. Keep watch for, things."

"Its raining and it looks like its going to rain all night."

"Only water ser, I'll live." She sniffed and swiped at the water running down her face. "Its not that cold."

"Its freezing. I need you fit not sick. If you stay out here your armour will never dry and you'll get sick." Her lip curled at his logic. "Stop being insubordinate and do as I tell you."

"Yes ser."

"It looks quiet enough. I'll go in and get us a room. Keep a watch for me to open the window."

"Yes ser."

He hated leaving her out here but they had no choice. If they went in together not only would that make them more visible, it might mean the innkeeper would refuse them a room. They could try pretending Gwyn was his servant but that wasn't very believable with her in that armour.

As much as he resented it he'd have to pretend to be alone and let Gwyn in through a window. She didn't seem too concerned, but he supposed she was more used to it than he. Nothing like direct experience to force understanding on you.

Standing under the shelter of the awning over the door, Alistair shook himself to get some of the water off, then went inside the brightly lit Inn.

"Evening ser! Terrible night for travelling." Wiping the bar down Lark eyed his new customer. "After a room are you?"

"If you have one? Its ghastly outside." Hearing himself, it was difficult not to laugh. It couldn't hurt if the innkeeper assumed he was a noble.

"Of course ser! We don't get many travellers this time of year, not out this way. It was different before the Blight of course, used to get all sorts."

"I came through here myself then, I stayed in Lothering though, not here. I didn't know this Inn was here at all."

"Well, ser, we were and we weren't, as you might say. We were the 'Black Lamb' then. Changed the name after the Blight came through. The Blight Wolf seemed more suited."

Suited, if you had a taste for fairy tales where children were devoured by wolves. "If you don't mind, I should get up to my room. I'm soaked through to the skin."

"Oh, yes ser, here's me keeping you chatting." Lark took the coins his customer held out. "The room at the top on the left will suit you. Will you be wanting supper?"

"I will. If its not too much trouble?"

"None ser, none. Its set up in the main room there. We've a few other guests you might not find congenial, if you get my meaning. Some elves passing that wanted a meal. Don't you worry ser they won't be here long. I can't be choosy on a night like this one. How about I make up a tray for you to take up?"

"That would nice. Thank you." The Innkeeper seemed like a decent man and he'd only expressed what the majority of humans thought. Knowing that didn't lessen Alistair's urge to punch him in the slightest.

. . .

Alistair knew he was fussing but he couldn't help himself. After pulling Gwyn up into the Inn he'd given her his spare shirt to put on and insisted she change while he tended the fire. Then he'd taken her wet armour and pushed her towards tray he'd put on the bed. The small room didn't have a table unfortunately, but the bed was big enough to easily seat both of them while they ate.

So, now she was sitting crossed legged on the bed, eating cheese, and watching him with a strange expression on her face. "What?"

Gwyn bit off another piece of cheese. "Sorry ser?"

"Why are you looking at me like that?" She looked down at the food and took some more cheese.

"I was just thinking. I like this cheese."

"The cheese?"

"Its hard to tell with cheese. It can look good on the outside but when you bite into it, its spoiled. I wasn't sure at first with this one, but I'm thinking, I like this cheese very much. Its just sweet enough to be appealing." She smiled when he flushed. "You should have some ser."

Apparently they _were_ talking about cheese. At least he thought so.

"I need to. Um." He patted his armour. "If you would?"

"Of course." She slid around until her back was to him. "Is that alright?"

"Fine."

The shirt was huge, almost coming to her ankles when she'd put it on. At least that meant she was decently covered. Gwyn tilted her head listening to the sounds of Alistair undressing and was thankful she was here with him and not another man. He made her feel safe enough to sit nearly naked, but for his shirt, on a bed while waiting for him to remove his own armour.

"Alright, its safe to look now." Keeping one hand on the blanket he'd wrapped around his waist, Alistair padded over to the bed. "Did you leave me some stew?"

"There's plenty." She pushed the bowl towards him. "Its still warm." She waited until he was settled and eating before asking the question that had been turning over in her mind. "Are we going to kill Arl Eamon?"

"Possibly. Are you shocked?"

"Me ser? No." Privately Gwyn didn't think it was a good idea but Alistair was in charge, if he wanted Eamon dead, she'd make sure he was dead. "I could sneak up there and do it."

"I said 'possibly' ser assassin. I'd like to avoid killing him if we can. Have some more cheese."

"How will I know if I need to kill him?" Gwyn wasn't fond of killing as a rule but for Alistair she'd do it. "Is there a code word?"

"No." Not sure if she was being humorous, he decided to assume she was being serious. "We'll kill him only if he leaves us no choice. I want to know why he sent those men to kill me. If I don't like his answer then perhaps we'll kill him. Or perhaps we'll say 'thank you for the information Eamon. I'm leaving the country now so please leave me alone', instead."

"Yes ser."

"You don't agree?" He could see she didn't. "I want your opinion Gwyn."

"Its not my place to say ser, but if Eamon sent those men to kill you, he's not going to let you leave Redcliffe if he catches you there." He didn't want to hear that. "Sorry ser."

"Don't be sorry, I asked for your opinion." She gave him that look again and held out an apple. "Thank you."

"We'll do our best not to kill him ser." Gwyn thought this was a good time to distract him. "Are we going to share the bed?" She blinked when he choked and spat a mouthful of apple at her.

"What!" Recovering from his shock Alistair looked at her and laughed. "I'm sorry but you surprised me."

"Yes ser." She wiped her face with the sleeve of his shirt. "I didn't mean bed me ser, just share the bed."

"Oh." Still chuckling he shook his head. "I suppose we'll have to." The bed was the only thing in the room apart from a rug in front of the fire. The Blight Wolf didn't appear to consider things like chairs necessary for their guests. "We'll take an end each. You can trust me Gwyn, I won't, er, take advantage."

"No ser?" He shook his head again. "I won't either."

. . .

Alistair woke to the sun and someone pounding on the door. A quick look around told him Gwyn had gone, dressed thankfully. As the window was open he assumed the knocking caused her to leave. "Yes?"

"Sorry ser. Its Lark, the Innkeeper. Were you wanting a meal? Only the wife's got it cooking if you do."

He'd love a meal. He was sure Gwyn would too. Rolling out of bed he walked the few steps to the door and pulled it open just enough so he could see the man outside. "Would you mind packing it for me? I must get back on the road now the sun's up."

"I'll do my best ser."

Once the man was gone Alistair walked to the window and leaned out. "Good morning ser elf."

"Morning ser." Gwyn had only managed to get as far as the window. "Should I wait by the river?"

"Yes, I'll be along soon with food." He leaned forward intending to pull the window shut when she jumped down.

On impulse, Gwyn leaned when he did and pressed a kiss to his lips. "Thank you ser." She jumped down and ran before he could say anything.

"Maker." Why had she done that? Not that he objected to being kissed by Gwyn, not at all. In fact, he'd thought about doing it a few times. When he'd seen her sitting on the bed wearing nothing but his shirt, Alistair had briefly wished he was another kind of man. The kind who knew what to say to a naked woman. Not the kind who spat apple over one who he'd thought had suggested they have sex. Oh he was smooth, no doubt about it.

All thoughts of the kiss were wiped from his mind when he realised he was naked and that she'd been looking in the window when he'd talked to the innkeeper. "Holy maker."

Gwyn ran lightly towards the river and snickered. "Nice behind your majesty." The rest of him wasn't too bad either. She'd shut her eyes when he'd turned around though. It would have been rude not to.

. . .

"Lothering." His mind drifted to that time during the Blight when Lothering had been full of refugees and not much else. "They're rebuilding it seems."

Gwyn leaned her elbows on the short wall on the side of the West Road and looked down at the small Town. "Did something happen here?"

"The Blight happened. The town was destroyed very early in the fighting." All those people dead. "Where you were during the Blight Gwyn?"

"Amaranthine ser."

"Ah, so you missed the delightful Darkspawn?"

"Mostly. We had some of our own later though. Can't be outdone by you Southerners." She was glad to hear him chuckle. "Ours were special ones."

"So I recall. Talking Darkspawn." Time to go. "Were you born at the Vigil?"

"No ser. Highever Castle." Gwyn knew he'd want more information that just that. "My mother was killed when Arl Howe's men came."

"I'm sorry Gwyn. That must have been horrible." Wanting to do something, Alistair patted her shoulder. "They didn't leave anyone alive did they?"

"Not really ser. Killed everyone." She walked a little faster to keep him moving. "Garevel, he was with them. He found me hiding in a cupboard and took me with him."

"Did he?"

"He never said, but I think he wasn't happy with what the Arl did. Killing all those unarmed people. I know he got into trouble for not killing me. They threw him in a cell for a while."

"I'm surprised they didn't execute him." And her. A live witness to what had happened.

"They were going to I think. Me as well. I ran off and hid in the woods. I used to go out with the hunters you see, so I could keep myself alive for a bit. Garevel said the Arl went off to Denerim and then he was dead too. Varel let him out and promoted him. "

"I'm surprised you stay with Howe's son in Command."

"It wasn't the Commander's doing."

"No, I suppose not. Most people would still find it difficult to serve under him."

"I don't see why. You've only to meet him to know he's nothing like his father was. That one would put his hand up your skirt while you served him dinner, the Commander would never think of such a thing." Just thinking about it made her shudder. What a horrible man the late Arl had been.

"You make me glad I helped kill him." Had killed him in fact. The memory of sliding his sword into Howe's chest was starting to seem like a happy one. While Alistair didn't usually take pleasure in killing, he might have to make an exception in this case. He stopped walking when Gwyn pulled on his arm.

"Thank you ser." He didn't seem as surprised when she kissed him this time. Gwyn was the one surprised when he held on to her and kissed her in return.

Alistair had never been as happy to see anything as he was to see Gwyn's expression after he kissed her. Feeling a little smug he gestured down the road. "Shall we my lady?"

"What? Oh, yes." Blinking didn't help clear her dazed mind. Wondering if a quick swim in the freezing waters of the River would help, Gwyn cleared her throat and followed Alistair.


	5. And the cliffs ran red

_Note : I have no idea if you can actually climb a wooden barrier in the fashion described. So kids, don't try it at home unless you're in plate armour and wielding a pair of Darkspawn longswords, taken from actual Darkspawn. Oh, and you are a former king of Ferelden with amazing upper body strength and more than a smidgeon of elf blood._

...

Growling in frustration, Alistair slammed his hand against the bars of the cell. The pain was welcome, it reminded him he was still alive and as long as he was alive, there was a chance Gwyn was as well. She'd looked so small when the soldiers had dragged her away. Small and fragile. He'd felt every kick they'd given her as if it had gone into his own body instead of hers.

How long ago had that been now? These cells were underground, he remembered that, connected to the tunnel from the windmill just outside Redcliffe Village.

Stupid. Stupid. This was _his_ fault. If only he'd listened to Gwyn and just gone to Amaranthine to take a ship somewhere. But no, he had to be a hero, he had to find out why Eamon wanted him dead. Well now he knew didn't he? Now he knew everything. This time he kicked the bars. His stupidity may have killed them both.

Hearing the sound of a door unlocking he moved away, to stand with his back to the farthest wall, and waited as footsteps approached. His captor stood a few paces back from the bars and lifted the torch he carried. After surveying his prisoner he shook his head.

"Alistair. Coming here was possibly the stupidest thing you could have done. I thought better of you than this."

He tried to answer, but, he'd spent the first few days yelling at them and then the next cursing them, now his voice was gone. He tried again and again until finally he was able to croak.

"Teagan."

. . .

"There it is Gwyn, Redcliffe Castle." It seemed a lifetime since he'd seen it last. "We'll wait until dark to go in."

"Yes ser." Busy scanning the area for weaknesses, she answered absently. "The bridge is the only way in?

"Yes. Its well fortified. There's a tunnel in from under the Windmill but we need a key." A signet ring to be precise. Which they didn't have.

"I could try picking the lock."

"Its not a normal lock." She made a disgusted noise and kept studying the area. "Thoughts?"

"Night will be best as you say. We have to get across that bare patch there, then across that bridge before even reaching the bridge to the Castle."

"That barricade was there during the Blight but Eamon had it taken down. Now its back. I wonder what that means?"

"He's keeping people out?"

"Or in? The lock's on this side. What in the Maker's name is going on here?"

Gwyn had an even stronger feeling that they should leave and not go into the Castle. "Ser, maybe we'd be best to leave."

"We've discussed this already Gwyn, we're going inside." He knew she was concerned for his safety so he wasn't annoyed at her suggestion. "I need to know."

"Yes ser."

"There's a safe place nearby we can camp. I'd like us to get some rest before tonight."

"Yes ser."

Alistair pursed his lips at her tone but didn't comment. She was worried but he knew she'd do whatever he told her. That was enough. "Come on then ser grumpy pants." Her lips quirked and he grinned. "We have some left over rabbit."

"Lovely."

"You'll need to try that with a bit more enthusiasm Gwyn, I wasn't convinced."

"Lovely!"

"Better, much better."

. . .

"Ser."

"Get some sleep Gwyn." Sighing he turned and tried to follow his own advice. Not easy, even in this small cave the light was bright.

"I was thinking ser. We could die, couldn't we?" She swallowed when he rolled over to face her. "Tonight I mean."

"We might, why?"

"Well, ser, if we die, I. Well. I think we should. First. I don't want to die without. You know." Her face must be as red as a beet. "I mean ser, I think we should have sex."

"I was getting that idea." Somehow the fact that she was so nervous made him feel more relaxed. "What if we don't die? We'll have done it for no reason." She bit her lip, obviously trying to think of another reason why they should have sex. "Unless you wanted to do it before you thought we were going to die?"

"Yes ser. When you kissed me, I, well, I wanted to then."

"Out there on the road? You hussy." When she didn't smile but nodded he sighed. "I was joking Gwyn."

"Oh."

He'd only had one woman, his wife, and according to everything he'd been taught that should be all he had. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." He sat and she jolted. "Sorry. I'm a bit, nervous."

"I'm nervous too." Alistair held his hand out. "Let's be nervous together." When she was close enough to take his hand he pulled gently until she was kneeling in front of him. "Who's armour do we take off first?"

"Yours." She'd already seen him naked. "You first."

"If I agree to that." He lifted the hand he was still holding to the buckle on the front of his armour. "You have to undress me."

"Me?" It might be good to have something to do with her hands. "I've never, I mean this kind of armour." How hard could it be? "I'll try." It seemed to strap in the same way as her armour and when she lifted the tab on the buckle it slid out easily.

That look of concentration on her face was irresistible. "Should we kiss first?"

"I think we'd best leave that until we're naked." He shuddered and when she looked up from the armour he was smiling. "Are you laughing at me?"

"Never." The strap loosened. "That holds the shoulder plate on." Her quick hands caught it before it fell. "You'll need to."

"Shh. I'm doing this."

"Sorry ser."

After carefully laying the shoulder guard down, Gwyn took a moment to look. The belt she thought. Once that was done, she was able to unbuckle the chest plate and arms. "Oh I should have taken the gauntlets off first."

Alistair held his hands out obligingly. "Pull." Her eyes narrowed at his tone but she didn't comment, just pulled the gauntlets off.

"Now the boots." She pushed and he leaned back on his arms. "Lift your foot and bend your knee." Turning she leaned back into Alistair's bent leg and pulled the boot off. "The other one."

This was taking a lot longer than he'd expected. Pursing his lips he wondered how quickly he could get Gwyn's armour off.

Time for the pants. Refusing to be embarrassed she hooked her hands around the top and tugged. They didn't move. "Cursed things."

"Undo them Gwyn." Obedient to her glare he didn't laugh. When she finally had him naked, he really didn't want to laugh.

"Oh." Without thinking she reached out to touch.

Alistair caught her hand just shy of contact. "Gwyn, if I can't kiss you yet, I really don't think you should be touching that either."

"Why not?"

Had she blinked since undressing him, even once? "I think you're supposed to wait until later on. Work up to that." He let go of her hand when she tugged free. "Now I need to." He stopped when she stood and started pulling her armour off. "Wasn't I supposed to do that?"

"No time. I want sex now."

"Oookay." He was grateful he'd at least done this once before. It would give him some idea what to do. He hoped.

"I'm naked."

"So you are." Before he'd quite finished enjoying the sight, Gwyn was kneeling and once again going after her earlier target. "Gwyn. Can I have at least one kiss before you sully my virtue?" He was still leaning back and didn't move when she shifted up. "Kiss me."

"Yes ser." Just before their lips met, they both smiled.

. . .

Waking with a woman in his arms was new, but Alistair liked it. He liked it a lot. He particularly liked that it was Gwyn. They hadn't known each other very long, perhaps some might say not long enough for this, but it had felt right to him. Not just because they might die tonight. It was her, something about her, that just made him feel he could do anything.

Pulling her a little closer, he put off the moment when he'd have to get up and face the night for as long as possible.

"Is it time to go?" She smiled when he kissed the side of her neck. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me. Kiss me." He lifted his arm to give her room to turn. "Kiss me and then we have to get ready."

. . .

"The gate is a problem ser. That lock, I can't pick it." Gwyn lifted it and let it drop gently down. "It looks like it needs something, not a key."

"A signet ring. I've seen this before." Cursed luck. "We'll have to jump it."

"I can ser, if you'll help me a bit, but how will you get over?"

Alistair stepped back to study the wooden barrier. Upright, sharply pointed logs, tied together with sturdy rope. "I should be able to manage if I use my swords. Let's hope there's no one guarding the other side."

"That would be bad ser." Gwyn walked away a few paces. "Back to the gate, hands like this. When I step in them, push me up."

"Understood." Alistair stood as she'd instructed, his hands making a cup for her foot. She ran at him and jumped, when he felt her foot his hands he pushed up, hard. "Holy maker, I wish I could do that." She'd gone up at an angle and flipped, very gracefully, over the gate.

Now for his turn, which would be much less graceful and require more effort. Best to do this near the rock wall. Unsheathing his swords, Alistair shook himself then ran at the gate.

Gwyn stepped back when the gate shook. Perhaps he was going to knock it over? It shook again, and again, then she saw the top of Alistair's head appear over the top. A few more shakes and he had the sharp points of the gate at chest height.

Now for the difficult part. Bracing one foot against the rock he heaved up and spun the swords until the hilts were flat against the wood and holding him up. This would either work or he would be impaled on the stakes. With one final breath, Alistair threw himself upwards, slammed the hilts down on the spikes and flipped over the gate.

Gwyn raced over to where Alistair was lying on the ground. "Are you alright ser?" She hadn't seen anyone on this side but was careful to keep her voice low. "You hit the ground a bit hard."

"Fine. Winded." Not very graceful but effective. "Won't do that again."

"Best not to I'm thinking." He'd need a moment. Gwyn crouched next to him and waited. "I can't see any guards from here."

"That's. Odd." Very odd. With Gwyn's help he got himself to his feet and looked around. "There's the castle gate."

"Yes ser."

"There's an open courtyard on the other side. Stay against the wall and we should be able to keep out of sight." Moving slowly, Alistair started across the bridge towards the castle gate. There was no one in sight, not even once they entered the courtyard. "Where are the guards?"

Gwyn shook her head and kept pace with him. There was something very wrong here. Alistair stopped, crouched in the deep shadows and she did the same. He was looking up at the stairs leading to the doors. She wasn't sure what he saw but whatever it was it didn't please him.

No guards. Not even at the Castle door. Surely they weren't relying on the wooden barrier to keep them safe? Even during the, problems, with Connor at least one guard has been set to watch it. Curse it what was going on here? It almost as if the Castle was empty. Nothing was moving, nothing.

This wasn't a time for a direct approach. They'd go in through the basement. After tapping Gwyn on the leg he moved in that direction.

. . .

It _was _empty. "This is creepy." Turning in a circle he scanned the empty hall. "Very creepy."

"I don't like this ser, it feels wrong." Feeling a need for it, Gwyn unhooked her bow and notched an arrow. "I can feel the air moving."

"You're imagining things. There's no one here."

"I think there is ser." A soft sound made her turn quickly. "Ser." Before she could lift her bow an arrow shot through the air and it was pure luck that it missed her. "Run!"

Too late. The doors they'd come in banged shut, trapping them inside. A trap.

"Take him to the cells." The guards moved to do so, only to stop when Alistair drew his swords. "Don't be stupid Alistair, I'll kill the elf if you fight."

After a moment's hesitation he threw the swords down and gestured for Gwyn to do the same with her bow.

"Take her." Gwyn tried to fight but the guard knocked her out with the flat of his sword and dragged her out.

"Teagan."

"The cells. If he gives you too much trouble, kill him."


	6. High justice

_So, I noticed a discussion on BSN about Alistair's age. As a writer I'm bad at descriptive detail but I did want to say in this story I've gone with youngest Alistair. Apparently to be Fiona's son he has to be 19/20 at the start of Origins. In which case he's 23/24 ish in this story (ish because the time lines are a bit dodgy in DA, almost as dodgy as my maths). I probably didn't need to tell you that but I wanted to..._

_Oh, if you'd like a mental picture, I kept seeing Teagan dressed like the man in the HN concept art while I was writing this. Swirly cape and all (particularly the swirly cape ;-) )_

...

"I've brought you a gift." Teagan nodded to the guard who unlocked the cell door. "Don't make me regret it." He moved back while the men dragged Gwyn into the small room.

Alistair crouched, frantically feeling Gwyn for injury. She was alive, thank the Maker, and seemed unhurt. "Teagan." Either Teagan didn't hear him or wasn't listening.

"I'll have some food brought down." He strode out quickly, leaving darkness behind.

"Gwyn." He blew out a breath when she moaned. "Are." He swallowed then forced his voice out. "Alright?"

"Fine ser." Using his arm for support she pulled herself up. "Head hurts a bit." Gwyn was enveloped in a hug that didn't seem to be going to end. She was happy with that. She liked to think she was a brave person, but being locked up like that had scared the spine out of her. When they'd come to bring her down here, she'd been certain she was going to die. Thinking of that, she held Alistair a little tighter.

Holding her as tightly as he could, Alistair wished, not for the first time, that he'd taken a ship somewhere. "Sorry."

"No." After a few tries she managed to push back. "You were right ser. There's odd things going on here." He tried to speak and she touched his throat. "Did they hurt you?"

"No."

"Don't talk." Gwyn didn't think there were any guards close to them, but she couldn't be sure. To be safe she whispered in Alistair's ear. Anyone watching might think they were kissing. "I have a dagger. In my boot."

"How?"

"Teagan. He put it there."

. . .

"Bann Teagan?" Perth jumped back when Teagan kicked a table over. He didn't blame him for being, upset, but this wasn't the best time to be showing it. "Careful my lord."

"Of all the stupid, thoughtless." Deep breaths weren't going to help. He'd had things, if not controlled, organised. "I should kill him."

Hearing the anger and not Teagan in that, he nodded but didn't respond.

"Its bad enough that he came himself, but to bring the girl with him?"

"I know." They'd had to rough her up a bit, to keep the other guards from getting suspicious. He'd liked it as little as Teagan. "It'll come right."

"Truthfully Perth, I can't see how." He'd never expected to fix everything but he'd thought, with Alistair gone, the Banns would settle easily enough with Anora ruling. The problem of Eamon he was still working out.

"You gave the girl a dagger. Was that wise my lord?"

"Perhaps not, but I won't leave her unable to defend herself." Some of the guards Eamon had left here were less than honourable. It wouldn't surprise Teagan to learn he'd recruited them from Rendon Howe's estate.

No, Teagan wouldn't be able to do that. Even at the cost of his own safety. Some might call that foolish but Perth could only agree with the need for it. The girl had done nothing to deserve being left at the mercy of those thugs.

"We could leave the cell door open. Let them escape."

"If I could be sure they'd actually leave, I'd consider doing that. Alistair can be remarkably stubborn when it suits him and I'm afraid the little information he has will make him even more curious."

"Knock him out and cart him off to Vigil's Keep?" Perth's suggestion was only half serious, but it was an option.

"That would be hard to explain to the guards. No. We'll have to play our hand as is and hope it doesn't leave us all dead."

. . .

He'd found a few bruises on her. Alistair would have liked to be able to strip Gwyn and check more thoroughly but this wasn't the place for that. He really hoped they lived long enough for him to see her naked again. Even if only to check for bruises.

True to his word, Teagan had given them food and since then they'd seen no one.

Assuming they wouldn't at least until morning, whenever that was, Alistair had pulled Gwyn onto his lap and told her to sleep. It only showed how tired the past few days had left her that she'd not argued, but just put her head on his chest and gone to sleep. He didn't think the guards had done more than kick her. From what she'd said her treatment had been similar to his, thrown into a cell and left alone.

They should be dead. All common sense should tell Teagan to kill them. Instead not only had he kept them alive he'd given Gwyn a weapon. Protection? None of this made any sense. He'd thought perhaps Teagan was the one responsible for the Banns finding out about his mother. That Eamon was as much a victim as he, but now it seemed that might be wrong.

If Teagan wasn't the one, why was he here? In a seemingly empty Castle with nothing but a few guards?

Resting his chin on Gwyn's head, Alistair stared blindly at the bars on the cell door and tried to understand what was going on. Gwyn's question was looking like it might be the right one. Who told the Banns. He thought if he found the answer to that, the rest would fall into place. Perhaps. Maker it was frustrating.

They'd have to find a way to escape. Unlike the last time he'd been locked in a cell, it was unlikely Zevran and Oghren would come to the rescue. The bars were solid, the first time they'd left him alone he'd tested them. For the time being they were trapped.

. . .

It was justice. Or it should have been. Walking slowly through the castle, carefully keeping to the shadows, she told herself that. Justice. Tell one Bann and soon they'd all know. Not Teagan, he'd known already. No understanding from Teagan. There never had been. Always watching her with eyes that judged, no admiration in those eyes. No pity, no compassion. Not for her.

Gripping the dagger tightly in her hand, she slipped past the guards and down towards the cells. The cells where they'd hidden the murderer of her child.

. . .

Alistair lifted his head at the sound of the door opening. Expecting to see a guard, or perhaps Teagan, he was surprised to see a woman standing in the opening. "Lady Isolde?"

He had a woman with him. An elf. Was it the same elf that had killed her baby? "Alistair."

Gwyn rolled to her feet and moved away to stand with her back to the wall. Whoever this woman was, she didn't like her sudden appearance.

Using the wall to brace his back, Alistair pushed to his feet. "You're here?" His voice was still hoarse, but a night, he thought it was a night, without speaking had helped.

Moving to one side she indicated the open door. "Run. I am setting you free."

"Don't ser."

He'd had no intention of moving. Isolde had little reason to help them. "What's going on Isolde?"

How dare he address her as an equal? She wouldn't chide him for it, not yet. He needed to believe she was helping him. "I sent the guards away. You should hurry, they won't be gone very long."

Did he take the chance she wouldn't betray them? Alistair would have preferred if someone else was standing at the door, telling him to run. Even Teagan would seem less of a risk. Isolde had never liked him, not even when he was a child, now she hated him. They'd killed her son and he was certain she'd never forgive that. No matter the circumstances that had led them to do it. No matter what little choice they'd had.

"Isolde."

"Don't!" She barely managed to stop herself screaming at him. "Don't waste time. You must go."

A glance at Gwyn and he saw her shake her head quickly. They were in agreement then. No trusting Isolde. "I think we'll stay."

"Don't be foolish! Do you think he'll let you live? He's going to kill you." Mind working fast, she tried to think of a weakness. What would convince him? "The elf too. Do you want her to die because you're too stubborn to accept my help?"

That was the last thing he wanted, to be responsible for Gwyn's death. His need to find answers had already caused her enough pain. "How will we get out of the Castle?"

"Follow me, I'll show you." Isolde moved further back into the wide corridor between the two rows of cells. "The stairs."

"Ser." Gwyn was torn between the chance to escape and her feeling that there was something wrong. "Are you sure?"

"No." He took the hand she held out and they followed Isolde up the stairs. He wasn't sure about this, but he was sure he didn't want her hurt. "Keep your eyes open."

"Yes ser." She'd do more than that, she'd be ready to use the dagger in her boot.

"This way, hurry." Isolde hurried through the darkened room, hearing them following close behind. "Just a little further." She was concentrating so fiercely on what she where she needed to take them that she didn't notice the guards were all gone. All of them, including the ones she'd paid to look the other way.

"Where are you going Isolde?" Teagan stepped into her path, Perth and two of his own men just behind him. "I asked you stay in your room."

"Teagan. I was. Nothing. Just walking, you see, I was unable to sleep."

"Walking." Her mind had gone, driven mad by grief. Or perhaps that's what she wanted him to think. It was difficult to know. "Do you think I can't see Alistair there behind you?"

"Oh, he's always getting into places he shouldn't. I've asked and asked Eamon to send him away but will he listen? No."

They could try running but Alistair wasn't sure they'd get very far. Teagan and his men were standing between them and the door to the main floor. The other rooms were all dead ends. Behind them was the cells.

"Go to your room Isolde." He saw her eyes drop to the sword he was tapping against his foot. "Now." He'd only once made the mistake of talking to her while unarmed. "I'll deal with our guests."

Incensed by his interference, Isolde gripped the dagger hidden in her cloak and nodded. "Yes Teagan." He was armed but if she moved quickly enough that wouldn't matter.

Teagan watched her carefully as she walked slowly past. "Good night Isolde."

"Good bye Teagan." At the last moment she lunged at him, feeling the dagger sink into his body. Gripping the now bloody dagger Isolde ran towards the doors.

"Curse it." His sword dropped from his numb hand. "After her!"

Perth moved quickly to help Teagan stay standing. "My lord?"

"I'm fine." He should have known better than to think she was unarmed. He looked down at the hand he had pressed against his side. Blood was dripping out around it. "Or perhaps I'm not." His other side was lifted and he glanced down at the elf. "Shouldn't you be running away?"

"Yes ser." Gwyn moved when Alistair pushed in to help. "After we fix you."

"I hope you're not the villain here Teagan, I'll feel very foolish for helping you if you are."

"I locked you up didn't I?" He let Perth and Alistair help him to his room. "That would seem to indicate I am."

Alistair glanced down at a dead guard and shook his head. "I messed up didn't I?"

"Yes." Once his men had told him Isolde was in the dungeon, he'd had to revise his plan. Pretending to be Eamon's man wasn't working any more. Its time had probably run out in any case, with the guards asking questions about why Alistair was still alive. Unfortunately that left them alone against the Banns and Eamon. Not a position they were likely to win from.

After gently lowering Teagan to sit on the bed, Alistair stepped back and let Gwyn in to tend the wound. "It was Isolde who told the Banns about my mother? And sent those men to kill me?"

"Someone sent men after you?" Teagan winced when Gwyn pressed her hands to his side. "Careful my lady."

"Its bleeding badly but not deadly." She pulled the dagger free of her boot. "We'll need to seal it." She was impressed when he just nodded. "The fire will need to be higher ser, if you would?" While the knight did that, Gwyn unfastened the cloak and started removing Teagan's breastplate. "It won't hurt much ser."

"Nothing you do to me could hurt."

Alistair scowled when Gwyn giggled. He'd barely even managed to make her laugh and now she's giggling because Teagan flirts with her? "If you don't mind? Deadly serious situation? Men chasing after me? Isolde insane and loose in the Castle? Civil war brewing?" He growled when they smiled at each other. "Maker's breath!"

Perth cleared his throat. "Fire's ready."

"Thank you ser." After pressing Teagan's hand over his wound, Gwyn went to the fire. "If you would ser?" They all looked at her. "Oh. Alistair? I need you to hold, Teagan, up when I do this."

That was something, he supposed, even if it was only through necessity. His name at last and not that formal 'ser'. "Yes ser."

"You, um?" Gwyn pointed.

"Perth."

"Perth, something to wrap the wound once its sealed." He moved to do that. Crouching she held the dagger in the fire. "No screaming."

"I can assure you my lady, I won't scream."

Braced behind him, Alistair felt Teagan tense when Gwyn came towards them with the red hot dagger. It might be petty but he felt some sense of satisfaction when Teagan, if not screamed, yelled, when the dagger seared his wound closed.

Taking deep breathes wasn't helping the pain. "Holy Maker that hurts."

"You're being very brave." Gwyn quickly wound the strips of cloth around his waist. "Very brave."

"He sounded like a chicken being strangled." Alistair sniffed when Gwyn stopped bandaging to stare at him. "What? He did." After shaking her head she went back to work.

He was jealous. How, unexpected. Unable to stop it, she smiled. How nice. "There. Now lie down and rest."

"There's no time." Teagan tried to stand but his legs wouldn't hold him. "Curse it."

"A few hours won't matter." Gwyn pushed gently until he lay down. "There, now, just rest." Satisfied when he complied, she moved back. "Now, we'll need to." She made a noise like a chicken too when Alistair pulled her off her feet and kissed her.

Teagan laughed then winced when it pulled at his wound. "Perth, see if the men have found Isolde."

"Yes my lord."

There was nothing left for him to do but rest. As much as he might prefer action, Gwyn was right.

When Alistair finally let her go, Gwyn blinked and tried to remember how to breath. "Andraste's tits."


	7. Coincidence?

_Caveat : I haven't read The Calling. I tried to reference the events in that as little as possible while still giving Alistair information. I did refer to David Gaider's posts on timelines from BSN so hopefully its all good on that front. Apologies as always if I've erred on any salient points. _

_Edit - I've tweaked some of the dialogue. Hopefully its now clearer and easier to follow. Thanks for everyone who's reviewed and please prod me if I fall into my bad habits again!_

...

"I feel fine." Teagan pressed his lips together to stop the smile when Gwyn frowned at him. "Really my lady, I'm fine."

"We don't have time for Teagan to lay about in bed. He's well enough for this."

"But ser." Gwyn sighed and nodded when Alistair lifted his eyebrow at her. "Yes ser."

"Now if that's settled?" Alistair glanced around the room at the other occupants. No one had any other objections. "I'd like to know what's going on. Who told the Banns about my mother?"

"Isolde. Alfstanna told me what was brewing and I." Teagan stopped when Alistair smirked at him. "I'm not allowed to speak to a fellow Bann?"

"No, no. Nothing wrong with 'speaking' to a fellow Bann. Nothing at all." Particularly not when the fellow Bann was a woman like Alfstanna.

"Hmm." After eyeing him for a moment, Teagan let it go. "As I say, Alfstanna, told me the Banns were, aware, of your parentage and that someone was stirring them up. It wasn't too difficult to narrow it down to Isolde. From what I could find out, while she was in Denerim with Eamon she let a hint drop in Bann Ceorlic's ear. That was enough. He's a Loghain apologist, as you know, and just looking for an excuse to cause trouble for you."

"Excuse me ser? He didn't question it at all?" Gwyn knew it wasn't her place, but thought this was important enough to interrupt.

"No, he appears to have seized on it eagerly. I'm sure Isolde was very convincing." Teagan knew what Alistair would want to know. "Your father promised your mother you wouldn't be told. That he'd raise you as human."

Alistair frowned at that. "Why?"

"Sorry ser, but is that a serious question?" Gwyn was surprised Alistair needed to ask. "I'd do the same if I had a baby with a human. Give it a proper life, not be treated like its nothing because its an elf."

Alistair supposed he could see a mother wanting to do that. "If that's true, why Eamon? His wife's brother? That seems a little, inconsiderate."

"Maric trusted Eamon to look after you." How many arguments had they had about Eamon's way of caring for Alistair? Too many. Teagan wondered if he'd have been better to have insisted on taking Alistair to his own home and raising him. Too late for regrets now.

"He did his best." That loyalty seemed hollow now but was instinctive. Alistair had believed for so long that Eamon had done his best raising him. Now he wondered if believing that had stopped him from thinking too closely about the way he'd been treated.

"Did he? I don't think he did, but it hardly matters now. We have more pressing issues to deal with." Teagan tried to move the conversation back where it was the most useful.

"Yes, of course. The Banns." Unable to sit still, Alistair paced the room, thinking it out. "The Banns are in uproar, civil war is threatening, no time to be worrying about the past."

Teagan watched him for a few moments. Poor bastard, he'd done nothing to deserve this. Alistair would have been much better off if that Warden had named Anora to rule alone. Much better.

"I still believe things will settle if we get you out of the country. Without a figurehead, any support for you will have to dissipate. Anora is capable, she's proven that, and the Banns should accept her as ruler. They want civil war as little as we do. Of course by coming here you've made it a lot harder to actually get you away safely."

"Why would Eamon send his men to kill me? It doesn't make any sense." Alistair still wanted to believe it was a mistake.

"I wasn't aware he had until you mentioned it. Isolde was behaving erratically and as I was intending to travel home, Eamon asked that I bring her here. Then events overtook us and we've been trapped."

"When did Alfstanna tell you about the Banns?" Alistair wondered how a messenger had reached him so quickly.

"The day I sent the message to Anora. I sent her home, this is hardly the place for her and she has Waking Sea to deal with."

"And you lived to boast of it? Did she at least give you some bruises?" The idea of Teagan telling Alfstanna what to do was, well, funny, and Alistair had to smile.

"Very funny. I didn't put it to her quite that way. I managed to convince her to leave for a while, and Alfstanna did want to tend to her own people." When Alistair's eyebrow lifted Teagan shifted but refused to be embarrassed. "Anything else is hardly your concern."

Alistair settled for a smirk. "Is Eamon siding with the Banns in this? Do you think he'd do that?"

"Eamon will do whatever he thinks will gain him the most benefit." How long had Teagan wanted to say that aloud? "It would seem a losing battle, one man against the whole of the Bannorn. The king can't keep power without their support and if enough of them withdraw it, you'd either have to step down or gather your own supporters and fight."

Alistair put his thoughts into words, thinking aloud. "So, you're saying, Eamon would rather kill me than chance I'd lose a battle with the Banns? Assuming I'd even gather enough support to start a fight in the first place? Even if I had stayed in Denerim to make a stand, he could have thrown his lot in with them and not me."

"Begging your pardon sers?" Gwyn had listened to them discussing this and she thought the answer was clear. "Eamon knew who your mother was when he put you forward to rule, yes?"

"Yes." They spoke at the same time, then Teagan shook his head and spoke. "Yes, he knew, but I'm not sure why that's relevant?"

"If I can work that out ser, surely the Banns could too? Best to kill Alistair so they don't think about it too much." Gwyn waved a hand to emphasise her words. "Even if he did take their side, they'd realise eventually. He's responsible for putting an elf on the throne of Ferelden." The waving hand gestured across her throat.

"I hadn't thought of that. Well done Gwyn, beautiful and intelligent." Teagan grinned when she flushed. "That means if Eamon learns Alistair is here he'll try again. He'll keep trying until he succeeds."

"He's in Denerim?" Gwyn tried to picture a map in her head.

"Gwyn. No." Alistair could almost see what she was thinking. "You're not going to Denerim to kill Eamon."

"But ser."

"No." He saw that stubborn expression, the one he'd seen in the Brecillian Forest. "I said, no. I'm in Command, aren't I?"

"You." After slamming her fist on the table she jumped to her feet. "Yes. Ser." With that Gwyn turned and stormed out.

"Very well done Alistair. Never reason with a woman, give them orders, that'll work very well." Teagan waited until Alistair was glaring at him instead of the door before finishing. "That was sarcasm in case you missed my point."

"You don't know her, she's, stubborn as a Mabari once something gets into her head. I wouldn't put it past her to sneak out even after I told her not to go." Alistair worried she'd get hurt or, Maker forbid, killed.

"As much as I hate to say it, Gwyn may be right. We may have no choice but to kill Eamon." Teagan had never thought to hear himself say that. Kill his own brother. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that."

"I'm sorry Teagan, this is my fault. I should have gone to the Vigil. Curse it!"

"The Vigil? Vigil's Keep? The wardens? Yes. Perfect. Even the Banns would think twice about attacking you there. Is that there where Gwyn came from?" That would explain how Alistair managed to find himself such a useful companion.

"What? Yes. She's one of Howe's scouts, he sent her to fetch me." Something Alistair was grateful for every day.

"Clever of him. Well, we can do no less than to follow his advice. You'll take Gwyn and go Vigil's Keep. I'd suggest going up this side of Lake Calenhad and along the top of Ferelden. Much faster and you're less likely to run into Eamon's men."

"Run away?"

"Maker, yes, run away. We'll all be much safer with you out of the country. Take a boat somewhere. I'd suggest the Free Marches but I hear they're having problems there. Antiva or Rivain perhaps?" Teagan could see Alistair wanted to refuse.

Alistair paced again, thinking about it. Running away seemed, cowardly, but here he was being presented with that as his only real option. "Tell me about my mother."

"Your mother?" That seemed a little strange. "Why?"

"Just tell me what you know."

"Fiona, was a warden and came to Ferelden with Genevieve. She travelled with your father and the other wardens into the Deep Roads. I believe that's where they became, involved." Teagan tried to remember what Eamon had told him.

Genevieve? "Duncan knew." Halting suddenly Alistair turned to face Teagan. "Duncan knew didn't he?"

"I'd assume so. I can't say for certain." Teagan could see that was more distressing to Alistair than the idea that Eamon wanted him dead.

"You said 'was' a warden, is she dead?" Better to think about his mother than Duncan. What Duncan might have known and not told him.

"I don't know. Its possible she's still alive." Teagan could see Alistair was disturbed by what he'd heard. "They did what they thought best Alistair, all of them."

"Yes. I'm sure they did what was best for _them_. Never mind me, what I might have wanted."

"You heard what Gwyn said, she'd make the same choice." Teagan thought Alistair saw it as just one more thing he had no control over. Poor bastard.

"She'd give her child to a stranger to raise? A stranger who'd give that child as little care and attention as possible before sending him off to be caged by the Chantry! I don't think so. In fact I'd go as far as to say she'd kill anyone who suggested it." Alistair thought he knew Gwyn well enough to say that.

"Fiona gave her child to his father. Gave _you_ to Maric to raise. Anything that happened after that is his fault, not hers. She did what she thought she had to."

Something seemed, odd, to Alistair. "Why did Maric give me to Eamon? His wife was dead. There was no reason for him to hide me away."

"I don't know." Teagan had his suspicions but wouldn't voice them to Alistair. Did Maric worry about the succession? Cailan was older but that meant nothing. If Alistair had grown up better suited to ruling, more capable, there may have been problems. It was impossible to know for certain with Maric long dead. Eamon may know but it was doubtful they'd find out from him. "I'm sorry Alistair but I don't know."

"Alright." There was little point badgering Teagan for information he didn't have. "I think you're right. As much as I'd prefer to fight, its best I leave."

"It is. I know that's difficult to believe but it is." Relieved Alistair had seen reason, Teagan, let out his breath.

"What about you? Eamon will find out his men are dead."

"True. However, I'm not a friendless, former king with no resources. I have my own men and some support from other Banns. Eamon may try to kill me but he'll try at risk of his own life. Once you're on your way to Vigil's Keep, I'll take my men home to Rainesfere. If we make it safely, Eamon should have the good sense to leave us alone."

"Am I allowed a night of rest before you throw us out into the cold?" Decision made now, Alistair felt better. Even if he didn't like the decision, it was still a decision and that was something.

"Of course. My men have locked Isolde in her room and I've set two of them to watch her. She shouldn't bother you again."

"She bothers me because she's right in one way. I killed her son. Whether justified or not its still a horrific thing." Thinking about Connor still made Alistair angry, at the futility and waste of it. Poor child hadn't deserved his fate.

"I know Alistair, but don't forget Isolde's choices caused the problem in the first place. She bears some of the responsibility for what happened. I think that's why she's so determined to punish you, so she can forget how guilty she is."

. . .

"I've agreed with Teagan that its best if I leave."

"Yes ser." Gwyn could see he wasn't happy about it. "Its best."

"I know that. I am just tired of leaving other people to face my problems. First Anora and now Teagan." Sighing, Alistair leaned back against the door.

"Ser. Alistair. If you stay, they'll kill you. Kill me, kill a lot of people. Is that what you want?"

"No and that's why I'm leaving." Once again he was trapped by events beyond his control. "Curse this. I didn't want to be king. Did you know that?"

"No ser, I didn't." Gwyn held her hand out to encourage him to come closer. He did thankfully and sat on the side of the bed, holding her hand between his. "Why didn't you want to be king?"

"Who in their mind would? I wanted to be a Grey Warden, its the only thing I ever really wanted to be. Being king, much like being a Templar, was forced on me."

"Oghren said you wanted to be king. Asked to be made king."

"Did he mention I was angry at the time? Very angry in fact." Her head shook. "I didn't think so. Caethes, she recruited Loghain and I wanted him dead. I lost my temper and when they wouldn't execute him, I took the throne so I could do it." Alistair hadn't quite realised he had a temper until then. It had surprised him as much as Caethes when he'd lost it that day.

"You didn't though, he killed that Archdemon didn't he?"

"He did. Died very heroically. Which is probably better now for Anora but at the time it made me even angrier. People forget you see and now they'll only remember him as a hero, not that he abandoned us at Ostagar, tried to have Eamon killed, sold Ferelden citizens into slavery and caused a civil war."

"Loghain wanted Eamon dead? Why ser?" Gwyn couldn't remember that she'd heard that before.

"To keep him out of the way and avoid the trouble that did happen. We cured Eamon and he called a Landsmeet." Alistair still shuddered thinking about Haven and the people there.

"Ser. I know I wasn't there and all, but did Loghain say why he did it?" He frowned at her. "Only I'm thinking, what if it wasn't for that reason? If Eamon is willing to kill you off to save himself, might there be other things he'd do as well?"

"Jowan, the mage who poisoned Eamon, he said Loghain told him Eamon was a danger." At the time they'd assumed it was a lie told to Jowan to ensure his cooperation. Why lie though? Jowan was on his way to execution, surely offering him his life should have been enough?

"Could be he told the truth. Do you reckon Loghain knew something about Eamon? Something maybe no one else knows?" Gwyn knew nobles kept secrets, maybe some had bigger secrets than others.

"Its possible but it sounds a little unlikely. If Eamon was truly a danger why not publicly denounce him, have him brought to the Seneschal in Denerim?" Alistair sighed, this was pointless. "It doesn't matter now. We're off to the Vigil in the morning, which I'm sure will please you."

"Yes ser. Morning ser?" Gwyn tugged on their clasped hands, pulling him closer. "You reckon you'd like to share the bed with me?"

"I'm not sure. How much room will you take up?" It seemed a shame to kiss that smile, he saw it saw so rarely. Alistair did it anyway, some things were worth sacrificing for.

"Not too much, I reckon you'll manage." Gwyn loved hearing Alistair laugh, even if it was only a quick laugh at her silly joke.


	8. A really long tunnel

_Author note : (Yes another one ;-) ) The connection from Orzammar to Kal'Hirol is mentioned in the epilogue slides from Awakening. I couldn't find a time line for the Helmi family finishing the connection but the slides do say the Warden was invited to the ceremony honouring the Casteless who defended Kal'Hirol. I've assumed House Helmi are mad keen diggers and fighters and its only taken them a few years to complete it._

_As always apologies for any errors and omissions._

...

Alistair jolted awake. "Why is it always pounding? Can't someone just knock?" After shaking his head to wake himself up he raised his voice. "Yes?"

The door opened just far enough for Teagan to poke his head around. "Visitor with news. You'd best come down." That said, he shut the door and made his way back to the dining room. "Well done lad." Good sense at last. He'd wondered how close Alistair had managed to become to Gwyn, now he knew. In his opinion she'd be good for him, just the right mix of bracing good sense and pig headed stubbornness.

"Ser?" Gwyn blinked in the bright sun. "Time to leave?"

"A visitor it seems. We're summoned to the dining room." Turning to look at her, he blew out a quick laugh. "Someone startle you my dear?"

"What? Why?" His eyes shifted to her hair. "Oh." Touching it carefully, she could feel it was standing on end. "Its your fault."

"Yes dear. My fault. Of course it is." She'd kill him if he smiled again, he knew she would. "Perhaps you should let it grow a touch? Avoid these problems in the future?"

"Too much trouble." Reaching under her pillow Gwyn retrieved a dagger rolled out of bed. "I'll cut it shorter." The fire was still hot enough by the look of it.

"With that!" She paused mid step to grin at him. "What?"

"You sound like Anders. Are you prissy about your hair too?" Being offended by that kept him busy for a few seconds, so while she waited for his reply, Gwyn bent over at the waist and started cutting her hair off. The cut pieces went into the smouldering ashes to burn.

"I am not prissy about my hair. Cheeky wench."

"There." Finished she rubbed her scalp roughly and stood upright. "What now?" He was giving her a very strange look.

"Ah. Nothing." That had to be the worst haircut he'd ever seen. "Why don't you come over here and let me tidy that up a bit?"

She was right, prissy. She should have known the first time she'd seen his hair. "Yes ser." The only other man she knew who wore his hair like that was Anders. "Do you want me to cut yours?"

"No! I mean, no, thank you. I'm fine with it this way."

. . .

"Good morning my lady. If I might say you look very fetching today." Teagan found great pleasure in making Gwyn blush. He'd decided she needed to be flirted with often. Her reaction told him she'd spent too much of her life surrounded by soldiers and while he could he intended to let her enjoy being a pretty girl. He must remember to speak to Alistair about that before they left.

"Morning my lord." When Alistair pulled a chair away from the table she looked at him, confused.

"Sit down my dear." Alistair gestured at the chair. "Allow me to fetch you some food."

Or perhaps he wouldn't. Alistair had obviously picked up on his intentions. Good lad, Gwyn needed some pampering. "Allow me to introduce our guest. Bann Alfstanna, this lovely young lady is Gwyn and you know Alistair don't you?"

"We've met." Know him indeed. Reminding herself to pinch Teagan later, Alfstanna nodded to the others. "Well met. My apologies for interrupting your rest."

"I understand I owe you my life. Interrupting my sleep seems a small crime when I consider that." Alistair put the filled plates on the table and sat next to Gwyn. "Teagan said you had news?"

"Yes, I was on my way home when I heard. Some of my men who'd gone ahead, circled back to report. It seems Eamon's men are on their way here. I don't know if they're aware of your presence or not but I do know it means you should leave. Quickly."

"I see." Alistair glanced at Gwyn who seemed to be eating and not paying attention. She'd do whatever he decided, but he'd like her opinion. "Gwyn?"

"Yes ser?"

"Thoughts?" Her saw her glance at Teagan and Alfstanna before answering. "Go on."

"Yes ser. I'm thinking we go to Kal'Hirol and then the Vigil. This Eamon's men won't be looking for us there. Be safer."

"Kal'Hirol?" Alistair could see the other two were confused, not surprising. "Have they broken through from Orzammar?"

"Yes ser. Those dwarves are keeping the way mostly clear. Like I say, safer."

The Deep Roads. Alistair could clearly recall promising himself to never go near them again. So much for that then. "Well done Gwyn. Well done. The Deep Roads it is." To his surprise she smiled widely. "What?"

"Darkspawn! I love fighting darkspawn." A nice clear enemy to fight. That's what Gwyn liked. This business with Eamon was too mucky for her taste. She'd do what was necessary of course, but, darkspawn, much better.

"I'm surprised Howe doesn't make you a warden in that case." He grinned when she laughed and snorted at the same time. "That's funny?"

"I'm not a warden ser, I'm just a scout. Wardens are special." Shrugging she went back to her meal. Best to eat well before the long trip ahead.

Something for another time. Alistair let that be for now and concentrated on planning for their journey.

. . .

Gwyn cleared her throat and tried not to look nervous. "That's it then ser? Orzammar?"

"That's it. Fabled city of the dwarves." Alistair was happy to let Gwyn get used to the idea of going underground. He'd certainly found it, unusual, his first time. At least the only problems they'd have this time were darkspawn on their journey along the Deep Roads. No worrying about finding anvils and mad paragons. And Oghren. Mustn't forget Oghren.

"Those steps there. They go to the door?"

"Don't worry Gwyn, its quite open inside. Not closed in at all. Airy." Alistair could see her biting her lip with nerves. "Have you been inside Kal'Hirol?"

"Yes ser. Once." She gripped the hand he put around hers tightly. "I'll be fine ser."

"I know you will. Let's go in and see Orzammar. I can promise you, you've never seen anything like it." He had to pull her along but she came with him. When they reached the guard on the gate, Alistair wanted to laugh. It was the same one that had been here when he'd come the first time. "Greetings."

"You have business in Orzammar human?" The guard eyed them and their clasped hands. "Elf?"

"Grey Warden business."

As expected the guard sniffed but let them past. "You'll find the other wardens at their compound in the Diamond Quarter."

"Thank you." Alistair pulled Gwyn past the huge doors into the entrance hall.

"Other wardens ser?" Gwyn stopped walking and gaped at the place she'd walked into. "Oh ser."

"Impressive, no? Those are statues of their paragons." Tugging to get her moving again, Alistair stopped at the last statue before the door. "This is Branka."

"Oghren's Branka?" She leaned closer to look at the plaque. "What does it say?"

"I don't know. Its written in dwarven script." Watching her studying the statue and the plaque, Alistair had an idea. "I could teach you to read, if you'd like?"

"Me ser?"

"I don't see anyone else here, so, yes, you." Alistair wished he'd thought of it earlier when she smiled happily and nodded. "I've never tried to teach before but I'm sure we'll manage."

"You can do it." Gwyn was convinced he could do anything he set his mind to. Only look at how he'd found a way into the Castle when it seemed impossible.

"I'll do my best." Such confidence in him. Alistair didn't think anyone had ever had that much confidence in him before. He'd have to do his best to live up to it. "Now. Shall we see the wardens and borrow some supplies?"

"Borrow?" Gwyn hopped to keep up with him. "Another door?" He pushed it open and she was stunned silent.

"Amazing isn't it?" This time he pulled her more slowly across the pathway towards the area where the two paths and the path to the Provings met. "This area is called the Commons."

Gwyn felt she could stand here all day and not get tired of it. "Its so beautiful." She let him pull her along and just tried to look everywhere at once. They went through another door but this area was less interesting. "Oh, no lava?"

"This is the Diamond Quarter where the nobles live and where we'll find our fellow wardens." Howe must have stationed some here after the Blight. Handy for their needs. "Here we are."

"Last door." Gwyn wanted to bounce on her toes like Ceri did when she was excited. "This is fun."

"Glad I could amuse you." Alistair grinned down at her head and pushed open the last door. "Hello?"

"Well hello. If isn't the former king." Leaning against the wall his gaze went to Gwyn. "And little Gwyn."

"Anders." Gwyn took two steps towards him, then stopped and looked around. "Is Ceri here?"

"No, you're safe to hug me." Once she'd done that, he pushed her back. "You're well? No bruises for me to heal?"

"No ser." She hugged him again. Best get them in when Ceri wasn't around to stop her. "We've come to steal supplies."

"Have you indeed." Tempted almost beyond bearing to hug her again, simply to see how that jealous expression on Alistair's face changed, Anders managed to control himself. Gwyn wouldn't understand. He'd have to think of another way to prod him. "Where are you off to? If you don't mind me asking?"

"Kal'Hirol. Then the Vigil." Gwyn started poking around the room at the chests and armour racks. Finding a nice dagger she held it up. "Can we take this?"

"I'll come. I think my punishment is over by now. Yes, yes, take whatever you want." Anders smiled innocently when Alistair frowned at him. "You don't mind, do you, your majesty?"

Fabulous. A smart alec mage. Just what he needed. "What are you being punished for. Anders?"

"Oh nothing significant." He waved a hand, brushing that away. "I annoyed our cranky Commander slightly, so he sent me down the Deep Roads to kill darkspawn with the dwarves."

"Nothing significant? Yet Howe sends you into danger, alone?" Perhaps Howe wasn't as reasonable as he'd been told.

"What are a few darkspawn to a mage of my power and skill?" Showing off a little he flicked a small flame to life on his hand. "I burn their evil skins right off." He huffed when Alistair put his finger in the flame and snuffed it out. "Templars."

"What exactly did you do to warrant this punishment?" Alistair wasn't taking the mage anywhere until he knew that much. "It can't have been something minor."

"Oh fine, if you must know my, wife, is expecting a child. She's a little, temperamental, at times and being with child hasn't helped that. I upset Nate by teasing him about his new lady friend and he threw me into a puddle. That should have ended it but Ceri, that's my wife, she hit him in the arse with a lighting bolt a few days later." One of Alistair's eyebrows lifted and Anders smirked. "Its alright I laughed too."

"Why are you here if it was your wife who hit your Commander with the spell?"

"I told him I did it. Ceri's a blood mage you see. It seemed sensible not to let Nate upset her further."

Alistair glanced at Gwyn who shrugged and nodded. He'd accept her greater knowledge of the mage's character. "Another warden will be welcome. Thank you Anders."

. . .

Gwyn shivered, looking down the long, long, length of hollowed out rock ahead. "Its dark isn't it?"

"Think of it as a really long tunnel." Anders patted Gwyn's shoulder. "There's light at the other end, trust me."

"Yes, ser." Not very reassured, Gwyn looked up at Alistair. "Sorry ser." She grasped the hand his held out eagerly. "I'll be fine."

"Of course you will. Once we kill a few darkspawn you'll forget where you are." Her smile was a little unconvincing but at least she tried. "Think of it my dear, hurlocks and genlocks as far as the eye can see. All waiting for a taste of your archery skills. It'll be." Alistair paused then, with a slight chuckle said. "Glorious."

"Let's go ser. Best we get it done." She looked up when Anders took her free hand in his. "Thank you ser."

"Practising to be a father." Gwyn did manage to make him feel paternal. Odd really. As they started walking Anders realised he was sorry his child wouldn't be an elf. He'd have liked that. Something of Ceri and his own mother to live on when they were all gone. Cursed human blood.

Once they started moving, Gwyn didn't find it so stifling. "Its quite nice down here." No darkspawn though. That was disappointing. "Do you reckon we can kill something soon?"

"I'm sure we'll be ambushed at any second." Anders didn't have the heart to tell Gwyn he hadn't seen a single darkspawn on the journey here. House Helmi had done a good job of clearing them out. He had heard of stragglers and the odd small group attacking but he'd experienced none of that. Hopefully their trip back would be more eventful.


	9. RockParchmentDarkspawn

_A quick thank you to everyone who's given feedback about this story. The third genlock on the left will be spared in your name._

_..._

It was a little disappointing to end the first day's journey without seeing any darkspawn. Gwyn had been looking forward to fighting some. Not just to distract her from the idea that she was standing _inside_ Ferelden. No. With nothing to do now camp had been set up and the meal prepared, she stood next to her bed roll and tried not to be too obvious about staring at the rock roof over her head. Was it moving! No. No, it wasn't moving. Was it?

"She's going to start running in a moment." Anders nudged Alistair and used his chin to point at Gwyn. "Go distract her with sex."

"I'm not going to have sex with you standing right here!"

Putting this new idea for embarrassing Alistair away for now, Anders instead gestured at Gwyn. "Well do something else then. Quickly."

"Gwyn!" Walking over to her, Alistair bent and picked up the book. "Time for your first lesson." He wasn't sure it was really suitable for teaching, but the choice in the Warden quarters had been limited. The book Anders had offered he'd prefer not to think about right now.

"Lesson?" Gwyn blinked when Alistair waved a book at her. "Oh ser, now?" She looked up at the, not moving, roof.

"Yes now. Sit." He had to pull her down but finally she sat. Glancing over at Anders he found the mage gesturing at him and then at Gwyn. He frowned and shrugged, not understanding. Then Anders held his arms out and Alistair thought he understood. "Here. I'll sit behind you and we can both see the book at the same time."

Thick-headed Templar. Anders gave him a quick salute when he finally got the message, then busied himself tidying up and generally not looking in their direction.

"Ser, I'm not sure." She stopped objecting when he shushed her. That and the fact that she could feel him warm against her back. It did help her feel less, worried, about the ceiling moving. "What book is it?"

"I'm sorry to tell you its _In Pursuit of Knowledge: The Travels of a Chantry Scholar _by Brother Genitivi. I've met Genitivi and all I can say is I hope his writing is a little more succinct than his conversation." He caught the edge of a small smile and kissed Gwyn's head to encourage her to relax a bit more. "Right. This is what I've decided. We'll read the book together. I'll say the word and then you say it. When we find a word we already know, you can read it alone. What do you think?"

"I'll try ser."

"There's no hurry, so don't worry if we don't get it right the first time." She looked back at him. "What?"

"We? Its just me learning isn't it?" That smile was almost enough to make her forget she was trapped under Ferelden.

"There might be words I don't know. Then we'll have to ask Anders to help us. I'm sure he knows words I've never even thought of." When she turned back to face the book, Alistair opened it to the first chapter. "Chapter 1, The Anderfels."

Anders made a mental note to take Alistair aside and give some tips about romancing women. Brother Genitivi! He should have thrown that in the lava, then they'd have had no choice but use the Navarran romance he'd borrowed from the library at the Vigil.

. . .

Gwyn pushed against Alistair's shoulders until he finally let her talk. "Anders?"

"I hope you're not calling me that?" She huffed. "Gone. Now quickly before he comes back." Ah huh, a smile. "Wicked girl." Alistair let her pull him back down.

Anders skidded to a halt. Seemed a shame to disturb them, but needs must. "Darkspawn!" Nothing. "Hey! Darkspawn!" They kept kissing. "Chantry priest!" That didn't work either. "Maker's sake you two! Darkspawn incoming!"

"You'd best not be." He stopped. Now he wasn't distracted, Alistair could sense them coming. "Darkspawn!" Alistair rolled off Gwyn and went for his swords. "How many?"

"More than a few and less than a horde." Anders lifted the staff he'd left behind and smirked at Alistair's confused look. "Never mind, you had to be there. About 20 I think. I didn't count, but it feels right."

Alistair concentrated a moment. "Yes, 20, or so." Checking Gwyn he found she'd armed herself with her bow looked ready to go. "Seems you'll get your fight Gwyn my dear." She mumbled something. "What was that?"

"Nothing ser." Right now she'd have preferred sex, but a fight would do.

Still holding his swords, Alistair jogged down the tunnel. "You're a healer? Can you fight?"

"Tell me what to do and I'll do it." Anders was happy to let Alistair lead, as long as he didn't do anything stupid. A victory over this bunch of darkspawn should work in the lad's favour with Gwyn and, quite frankly, he had no problem being ordered about. Much less stressful overall he'd found.

"Good to hear." Slowing, he held a hand up to keep them behind him. "Just ahead. Gwyn?"

"Ser?"

"An emissary." Alistair wasn't above feeling smug when they stared at him. "Templar, remember?"

"Handy." Perhaps he'd overlooked the usefulness of Templars as wardens. "Shall we take him out first?"

"Yes. Gwyn, if you would? We'll distract them, you take the emissary."

Gwyn glanced at Anders who shrugged. "I have mana clash?"

"No. Handy to know though. Spirit mage?" He grunted when Anders nodded. "We may need your mana for healing. If Gwyn can kill the emissary we can save your mana."

"Oh she can kill him." Anders had seen Gwyn shoot a rat off a drainpipe near the top of the Keep roof. An emissary would be an easy shot.

"I can kill him ser." She looked forward to it. "Genlock or Hurlock?" He blinked. "Can't you tell?"

"Hmm. I'll have to rethink my admiration if you can't, oh leader." Anders knew very well he couldn't, it was impossible.

"Hurlock." Alistair took a guess, there was an even chance he'd be right after all. "I'll go in first."

"Yes ser." Gwyn readied an arrow to fire. She'd trust Alistair was right and aim Hurlock height.

The smell hit him first. It had been so long since he'd seen darkspawn, Alistair had almost forgotten that smell. Trusting the others to do as he'd told them, he turned the last corner in the tunnel and found himself facing a large group of darkspawn.

The darkspawn reacted as he'd expected and attacked. The emissary stayed in the rear and after a moment started casting. "Gwyn." Just as he said it the hurlock flew backwards, an arrow lodged in his throat. The rest surged towards them in two groups, the first slightly ahead of the second.

Anders touched his staff to the ground then stood in the centre of the glyph he'd cast. Always nice to keep the enemy away from you he'd found. As they'd fought together before, he didn't distract Gwyn by calling her and once she'd had a chance to locate him, she ran over to stand in the circle. Settled in his position he quickly found Alistair and threw a quick heal on him before taking the time to paralyse the whole group of darkspawn attacking him. A bit of breathing room would help.

It was wrong of him, but Alistair quite enjoyed killing darkspawn when they were paralysed. They always looked so frustrated that they couldn't hit back. Very wrong of him. Spinning on one foot he lopped a genlock's head from his shoulders and turned to face another. This one was killed by one of Gwyn's arrows just as he stabbed a sword through its chest. The third genlock seemed to be made of stronger stuff and shook off the paralysis just in time to run. "Hey! Come back!"

About to chase it he was distracted by an incoming hurlock at the lead of the second group. He could feel Anders casting on him as he ran towards the approaching group. They looked like trying to run past him to attack his less armoured companions, so he hit them with Holy Smite. Being knocked off their feet stopped them nicely. "Come on you ugly, smelly. Things. Ignore those two they're harmless."

Alistair jolted when a skeleton ran up to him. Hearing Anders laugh he reminded himself to pay him back later. Right now an extra pair of hands would be helpful. Knowing it would follow Anders' instructions, he concentrated on working his way through the remaining darkspawn.

Gwyn saw the stunned darkspawn getting to their feet and carefully sighted one that wasn't actively being attacked with her scattershot. If she aimed it right the arrow should shatter on her target's skull and the shards would hit the darkspawn closest to him, stunning all of them. Once that was done she took a breath and, aiming up, peppered them with a rain of arrows.

. . .

After nudging one of the bodies with his foot Alistair glanced at Gwyn. "They don't make darkspawn like they used to." His slight disappointment with the quick end to the fight was tempered when she flushed. "Well done my dear."

"Hey! I helped. A bit." Anders patted Gwyn's shoulder. "She'd make a good warden wouldn't she?"

"No." Alistair sheathed his swords and started walking back to their camp. "Never suggest it again."

Anders coughed. "That's what Nate said." Keeping Gwyn beside him, he put an arm over her shoulders. "Do you have the same reason?" He saw Gwyn frowned up at him. "Worried for you. The joining can kill you."

"Oh? I thought. Oh." She'd assumed the Commander didn't think she was good enough. "But, ser, you said."

"I was joking. A joke." Glaring back over his shoulder at Anders' chuckle, he fixed him, with what he hoped was a 'shut up' look. "Don't mention it again. Anders."

"That's a noble thing isn't it? That pause before saying someone's name when you're annoyed."

Alistair ignored the mage's humour and kept walking. It wasn't just the joining, it was everything. Anyone else and he'd have said it was an honour and worth the risk. Not Gywn. He wouldn't have her possibly dying during the joining. Or surviving and finding out she'd only live another 30 years and most likely not be able to have children during that time. Oh and don't forget the dreams. Can't forget those.

No, not Gwyn. Anyone but Gwyn.

Gwyn looked at up Anders when he squeezed her shoulders. He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows then jerked his head towards Alistair's back. Not sure what he was trying to say she still smiled. She liked Anders, even if she did think he was a little odd. That Ceri of his said he'd hit his head once and maybe that explained it.

Oblivious to the fact that Gwyn thought was touched in the head, Anders steered her down the tunnel after Alistair. He considered it a very good thing that he'd objected to Gwyn being recruited to the wardens. He had refused to let Nate even consider recruiting Ceri for the same reasons he had no doubt Alistair was now recounting to himself.

He lifted his arm from Gwyn's shoulders when she pulled away. "Where are you going? Gwyn! I wouldn't." Oh well. A little argument might not hurt. He hoped. Deciding they needed a little time alone he slowed his pace until he almost standing still.

"I'd like to be a warden ser. If you don't mind me saying." Gwyn had to jog to keep up when Alistair walked faster. "Ser?"

"No."

"But ser."

"No!"

Gwyn stopped walking. "Its not up to you ser. I'll ask the Commander." She lifted her chin when he turned and came back to loom over her. "He'll see reason."

"I won't allow it." Why had he thought that stubborn look of hers was fetching? It wasn't fetching, it was annoying.

"You." Incapable of speech, Gwyn had to settle for poking him in the chest with her finger.

"Yes, me, I won't allow it."

"Its between me and the Commander." Chin in the air she pushed past him. "I'll ask him."

"No. You. Won't." Getting a good grip, Alistair lifted her up off her feet by the strap across the back of her armour. "No!"

"Ser!" He'd lifted her off the ground. Gwyn glanced down and around at him. With one hand! "Oh my."

"Promise you won't try to get Howe to agree. Gwyn?" He gave her a gentle shake when she didn't answer. "Well?"

"Sorry ser, but no. Its not your place to decide. Its for the Commander." Did he growl? He did! "Ser."

"We aren't discussing this. You're going to do what I tell you and that's an end to it."

Anders winced and sped up. He must find a chance to educate Alistair on the finer points of arguing with women. Telling them what to do was never a good way to go about it. He was surprised no one else had bothered to tell him that.

. . .

"Look on the bright side, being angry with you has stopped her worrying about the rock crashing down on her head and crushing us."

"Anders." Alistair sighed. "Never mind. You're right. It has distracted her." For two days Gwyn had refused to speak to him. Each night they'd camped she'd unrolled her bed, glared at him and firmly turned her back. He missed holding her. Cursed stubborn female why couldn't she see he was only trying to protect her? His attention sharpened when she came running back.

"Problem?"

"Anders. Kal'Hirol."

"Ah. Yes, thank you Gwyn." He wouldn't laugh, it was rude, and he really did feel for Alistair's problem. "Kal'Hirol Alistair."

"I'm not deaf."

"Just checking." Nodding to Gwyn, Anders tried a smile. "Any news from the outpost there?"

"No ser. They say its all clear from here." She sniffed at Alistair and turned to run back up the tunnel.

"Alistair. I think." Anders wasn't surprised when Alistair interrupted him, as he had done every time he'd tried to speak to him about Gwyn.

"_I_ think you should mind your own business. Thank you."

"You're running out of time. Tell her why you're being an idiot. Tell her you love her."

"Pardon?" Love Gwyn? Love? Did he? "I don't."

Anders couldn't help it, he did laugh at that. "No, of course not. I'm sure you always behave this way around women." Caethes had told him Alistair wasn't experienced with women. She wasn't one to gossip and he'd dragged that out of her. Curiosity had gotten the best of him one day when they'd been discussing Templars and she'd mentioned that Alistair had _almost_ been one. They weren't forced to be celibate but until they took their vows they were Chantry brothers. Who were celibate

Shuddering at the thought of celibacy, Anders, shook his head. "Just think about it. Don't let her get away because you're too stubborn to admit that you love her."

"I'm not stubborn." He wasn't. It was a new idea, that's all. "I'll give it some thought. Thank you."

"Any time. I like to see young people together and happy." Anders clapped a hand on Alistair's shoulder as they walked. "Call me an old softy."

"I don't think you're that much older than me Anders." He'd be 8 or perhaps 10 years older.

"Perhaps not in years, but in experience. Trust me when I tell you, I know women. And that one needs to be loved." He didn't say it but Anders was of the opinion it was what they both needed. Two such different people who were so similar in many ways.

"Gwyn tells me your wife pretty well runs you around like a dog on a leash." Alistair appreciated the thought but he wasn't having Anders tell him what to do, as if he was a child. "How does that factor into your 'knowing women'?"

"Ceri does not run me around like a dog on a leash! I manage her with skill and finesse."

"Ah huh. That's why you're down here being punished for her lack of control?"

"She was angry, rightfully so, at something Nate did. I did the gentlemanly thing and stepped between them. That's all. No leashes involved." He sniffed when Alistair grinned at him.

"If you say so." That had paid the mage back nicely for being patronising. "I said I'd think about it and I will."

"Alright, alright. I'll keep my mouth closed. For now." Time to change the subject. "There we are. Kal'Hirol."

Seizing the distraction, Alistair sped his steps. "Thank the Maker. Remind me never to come to the Deep Roads again."

"Never come to the Deep Roads again." Anders grinned when Alistair chucked. He might be a bit pompous at times but the lad had a good sense of humour. "Next stop, Vigil's Keep."


	10. The enduring vigil

"You'll want to stay down here."

Alistair frowned and looked up along the impressive looking tunnel that led to the surface. "Why's that?"

The dwarven guard who'd stopped them, shrugged. "There's some humans up there waiting. Might be for you, might not."

"An army?"

"I haven't seen them myself. You'll have to speak to the Captain. He's spoken to them."

"We appreciate the warning. Thank you." This was disturbing news. Nodding to the others, Alistair headed in the direction the guard had indicated. "They didn't tell you this when you came up before Gwyn?"

"No ser. Said it was quiet. Might have thought I was asking about darkspawn. I didn't tell them you were with me."

"A lone elf isn't a human and an elf. Possibly they didn't think this news was for you." Anders still didn't like it.

"We'll see what the Captain has to say. Then we'll panic."

"Good plan." Anders pulled his staff free and carried it. Best to be prepared. "Who do we think it might be?"

"Eamon's men have had plenty of time to catch up to us." He glanced at Gwyn. "Perhaps we might have been better to keep our plan to ourselves."

"Yes ser." Their argument could wait. Now was the time to show support. "You'll get us out."

He wished he could be so confident that he could. Still, her obvious belief in him made Alistair feel a little less worried. "I'll do my best."

They reached a doorway with two guards stationed outside. "The captain?" When one of the guards nodded, Alistair led his companions into the small room. It contained only a desk, some boxes and a lone dwarf. "Captain?"

"Yes. You would you be?"

"Grey wardens travelling up from Orzammar. We were told you might have news for us?" Alistair waited with as much patience as he could muster while the dwarf considered that.

"Might do. Had us another group of wardens down here a day or so past. Looking for an elf and a human." He studied them again. "You have two humans."

"Our extra wasn't expected."

"Ah." Again he studied them, then finally nodded. "Said he was the Warden Commander. Said to tell you he'd wait on the surface for you."

Alistair glanced quickly at the others who both looked a little cheered by this news. "Tell us about this Commander. What did he look like?"

"Look like? A human." Blowing out an impatient breath, he gestured at the two humans. "About that height, dark hair. Black armour. I don't know, he looked like a human."

"Daggers or a bow?" Gwyn butted in.

"Bow." Finally they seemed to accept that. "Now if you've finished? I'm busy."

"Yes, thank you Captain. Very much."

Alistair waited until they were outside and away from the guards before speaking again. "Sound like Howe you?"

"Yes ser." Gwyn looked up at Anders when he hesitated. "Ser?"

"It could be. I'd still suggest caution. How would Nate know we'd come this way?"

"A good point Anders. How would he know?" They couldn't go back and spend forever travelling the Deep Roads. They seemed to have no choice but to go out and see. "I'll go alone. You two stay behind until I send word its safe."

"What! No!"

"Am I going to have trouble with you now Anders?"

"I am not going to allow you to go out there alone. Don't bother with the 'I'm in charge' expression, if it doesn't work when Nate does it, it won't work for you."

"I need you to stay here with Gwyn. Please." As he'd expected that worked, and Anders sighed and nodded. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me, its stupid." Anders looked down at Gwyn who shrugged and nodded. Ah huh! They'd sneak up after him then. "Be careful."

"I will." Alistair dropped his pack on the ground. "I'll leave this here with you. If I don't, well, its got something in it you might find useful."

"Ser." Gwyn grabbed hold of his arm when he tried to walk away. "Kiss me."

Anders turned his back. Not that he objected to watching them kiss, but he thought they'd like the illusion of privacy. In case it was their last chance. Firmly stopping that train of thought, he instead tried to think of a plan that wouldn't end with Alistair dying horribly.

"Be careful ser." Gwyn hated to let him go alone, but he'd never agree to them all going up. They'd just have to follow him.

Alistair nodded and walked away. The path sloped gently upwards until ending at a closed door. There was a lone guard stationed there who nodded and pulled a lever. When the door slid up, he found himself facing a set of steps going steeply up. The steps seemed to go on forever until finally he reached a long wide hall. Turning at the first left he took a deep breath and walked firmly towards the wooden steps and daylight.

He saw them when he stepped onto the bridge. It was too late to turn back and he'd be cursed if he'd run like a coward. So he walked across and stopped on the hard dirt.

"Alistair. Kind of you to come out alone. That may save the life of your companion."

"Eamon." Curse it. "I'm leaving Ferelden."

"That may be so. Unfortunately for my own safety I need you dead. Apologies."

Eamon had at least ten men with him. Too many to even think about fighting. "Do these men know why you're killing me? Or have you lied to them too?"

"These men were hand picked from those you left alive after murdering poor Rendon Howe. Such a shame that. Still, it worked out for the best."

Either Eamon was completely insane, which Alistair doubted, or he was toying with him. Much more likely. "Get it over with. My boots are getting dirty standing here in the dust."

"Kill you quickly? After you've made me chase you across half of Ferelden? I don't think so. I think as I've borrowed so much talent from Rendon, we should put it to use." He gestured and two men came forward. "Take him."

They were half way across the space between Alistair and Eamon when the first one fell. The second barely had time to react before he too was dead, an arrow through his throat. Alistair turned but there was no one behind him.

"Arl Eamon. You have one chance to surrender."

Following the sound of the voice, they all looked up. The man was standing on a small ledge overlooking the path. "Who in the Maker's name are you!"

"Nathaniel Howe." Nate notched another arrow. "That's one of my wardens you have there. Let him go." Eamon turned to his men and the arrow flew, slamming solidly into the back of his neck. He fell forward and thudded into the hard clay ground without another sound.

Alistair had expected that Eamon might have to die. What he hadn't expected was that Nathaniel Howe would kill him.

"The rest of you. Surrender now."

"I see only one of you Warden."

Nate lowered his bow. The one who'd obviously elected himself leader stepped out of the pack. "I've killed three of you. Care to be next?"

"No, but I'm not surrendering to one man."

"I see." Lifting his fingers to his lips, Nate let out a shrill whistle. "If my men arrive before you surrender I'll have them kill you. You decide."

"You're bluffing." That smile reminded him much too strongly of the Commander's father to take the chance. "Hold. We'll surrender."

"Good choice." Nate waved to the men he'd brought with him, who made short work of rounding up the survivors. "Alistair? Where's Gwyn?"

Gwyn jogged forward out of the shadows. "Here Ser." She'd had Eamon in her sights the whole time but the Commander had beaten her to it. "Anders too."

"Anders?" Thank the Maker he hadn't brought Ceri. "Get yourself back to Orzammar."

"No." Grinning he waved his staff at Nate. "I've been punished enough." He could see Nate sigh but was too far away to hear it.

Nate sighed then after securing his bow, leapt lightly off the ledge to land near them. "Do you ever follow orders, Anders?"

Anders nudged Alistair. "See! I told you, its a noble thing."

Alistair was too busy frowning at Gwyn, who'd gone to hug Howe, to notice Anders' wit. "Timely arrival. Commander. How did you know we'd come this way?"

Nate hugged Gwyn again then pushed her away. "You're well girl?"

"Fine ser." He looked much happier than when she'd left. Even considering he'd just killed some people. "Alistair looked after me."

Oh, now she calls him by his name. "I did my best."

Men were dead. Anders told himself very firmly it would be an inappropriate time to laugh. "I'm well too, thanks very much for asking."

"What would you like done with the body ser?" Garavel had waited politely, but he knew Anders could go on forever if he was allowed to. "The noble."

"Alistair?" Nate thought that was better left to him. "Your decision."

Walking over Alistair looked down at the body of the man who'd raised him. The one person he'd thought he could always trust, who'd he thought had only wanted to do his best for him. "Chop off his head. Burn him in a pit somewhere." Looking up he met Howe's eyes. "Make certain he's dead."

There was a lot of anger there. Understandable. Nate knew he'd probably have felt the same in Alistair's place. "As you wish."

Taking one final look, and feeling like he was really casting off the past, Alistair turned his back. "Thank you for your timely rescue."

"A pleasure." Nate dipped a bow. "Thank you for watching over my scout."

"I helped." Anders saw Nate grin. "I did! A bit."

"One question before we leave. How did you know Eamon was going to order his men to kill me?"

Nate glanced over at the body his men were lifting. "I didn't."

"Why did you kill him if you didn't know?" Alistair was shown the expression Anders had described earlier. "I think I have a right to know."

Crossing his arms, Nate ran his eyes over Alistair. "I have the right of high justice. I exercised my right."

. . .

They were almost to the Vigil before Alistair realised Howe hadn't answered his question. How had he known they'd come through the Deep Roads? He glanced at Gwyn, who'd gone back to not talking to him. She'd spent most of the day's march to the Vigil with Howe, who'd seemed to find her amusing. He'd watched them carefully, she'd admitted to an attraction after all, but Howe treated her like a child more than a woman.

Even called her 'girl'. His first instinct had been to object to that, but thankfully he'd held off. It seemed to be a term of endearment. An odd one, perhaps, but a term of endearment nonetheless.

The fact that Gwyn was once again giving him a cold shoulder, meant he couldn't ask her if his suspicion was correct. That Howe had told her to use the Deep Roads if she ran into trouble getting him back to Vigil's Keep.

Had he sent Anders there to wait for them? "Anders."

"Hmm?" Busy contemplating all the nice things he could do to Ceri when he saw her again, Anders wasn't really paying attention.

"Did Howe send you to Orzammar to wait for us?" That got him the mage's full attention. "It all seems a bit convenient."

"If he did, he neglected to tell me." Pursing his lips, Anders thought about it. "He's devious enough and he'd know I'd come with you. It does sound like something our illustrious commander would do."

It hadn't quite sunk in. Howe was his commander now. He was a warden and nothing else. "Curse it."

"Curse what?"

"I never thought I'd be answering to a Howe." Alistair grinned when Anders laughed. "You can laugh, who knows what he'll do to me."

"Why would he do anything to you?"

"I did kill his father. In case you've forgotten." He hadn't. That fight had been particularly brutal and bloody.

"So did Caethes and believe me, he's forgiven her. What's that look for?"

"_I_ killed him. Not her. I was the one who shoved a sword in his stomach. She was busy healing us."

"Ah. I'd keep that to myself I were you. Just to be safe." Anders didn't think Nate was still stewing on his father's death, but it wasn't always easy to tell with him.

"I intend to." He'd been watching Howe and Gwyn while they walked. "Looks like an argument."

Anders looked where Alistair was. "Hmm. seems to be. Gwyn has that look." They both chuckled. "Wonder what she's after that he's refusing to let her have?"

"The joining?" Alistair hadn't forgotten the cause of their own argument and that Gwyn had said she'd work on Howe instead. It must be that, while they watched Howe looked back towards them then at Gwyn again. Whatever he said, she threw her hands in the air and promptly turned to come back to where they were walking.

"Hello my dear." It seemed having someone to be more annoyed at, made her decide not be annoyed with him any more. "We missed you."

"Cursed stubborn Shem." Gwyn slid her hand into Alistair's to show she didn't mean him. "Told me I should stop bothering him and go away."

"Ah huh." Alistair glanced at Anders who raised his eyebrows. "What did he really say?"

"He won't let me be a warden. Said he thought of me like a daughter. Rotten bastard. Saying something like that to me."

That was best news Alistair had heard since leaving Denerim. "Shall I challenge him to a duel?"

"No thank you ser."

Alistair gaped at her for a moment before remembering that Gwyn had taken his jokes literally before. "I was joking dear."

"Yes ser."

"To be fair Gwyn, Nate _is _old enough to be your father, so its not unnatural that he'd feel that way." Anders smiled when she scoffed.

"Pardon?" Alistair's gape was aimed at Anders this time. "Howe's not that old is he?"

"No, around the same age as me I think. Our Gwyn is only 17."

"What!"

. . .

"No I agree, she's much too young." Nate hadn't thought Alistair would be this sensible. "Leave her with us. I can promise you while I'm in command she won't take the joining."

"She won't agree to stay. When I mentioned it she got that look." Alistair knew he wouldn't have to explain which look. "We'll need to trick her."

"Yes." He could hear something in Alistair's voice that he hadn't expected. "Do you love her?" The younger man hesitated, then nodded. "If you're of the same mind in a few years, come back for her."

"Come back?"

"Yes, come back. Don't let her go. Trust me, you'll regret it if you do."

Alistair was already regretting it. He'd thought he'd found someone he could love, who'd perhaps love him in return. Now thanks to his inconvenient need to do the right thing, he'd be alone. Again.

"I suggest we travel together to Amaranthine. Tell her at the last moment that she's not going with you. You'll have to upset her."

"I know." If he didn't, she'd follow him onto the boat. If she did that, he'd never let her go. He couldn't take someone so young and inexperienced on what might be a journey with no end. Or worse, might kill her. "I hate this."

Nate hated it too. As much for the pain he was going to give Gwyn, as for the memories it brought. At least this time they were separating them to protect Gwyn's life, not someone's exalted family name. "My father sent me to the Free Marches when I was a few years younger than you. To separate me from Rhosyn. I do know how hard this is for you. Just don't forget to come back for Gwyn. Or I'll come and get you myself."

"I'll come back." If he had to swim across the Waking Sea to do it, he would.

. . .

"I don't want you with me."

"But ser."

"No. You're too much trouble and I can't trust you to do what you're told." He could do this. He'd just keep telling himself it was the right thing. "Look at what's happened already." Alistair knew Gwyn wouldn't challenge what was a blatant lie. She'd argued with him but never refused to follow his orders when it was necessary.

"I'll do better. Let me come, please." What would she do if he didn't? How could she stay here when Alistair was somewhere else?

"This is what I mean. Instead of doing what you're told, you're arguing with me." He could see Howe waiting at the gate to the docks. "Go back to your commander. He wants you. I don't." She just stood there staring at him. "Go!" Finally, thank the Maker, she nodded.

She wouldn't look at him again. If he didn't want her, he didn't. Gwyn had thought she'd made him happy, she'd done her best to. Walking blindly back to where they'd left the commander, she felt as if someone had stuck a knife in her chest.

"Gwyn?" Nate had seen Gwyn cry before. Those had been tears of happiness however, very different to these. She didn't sob or make any sort of sound, just cried. "I'm sorry girl." She threw herself at him and then she did sob. Cursing himself and Alistair, Nate held her, while her she suffered the pain he'd helped inflict on her.

"I thought. I thought he'd want to keep me."

"I know." They couldn't stand here in sight of the docks. Lifting her easily, Nate held her across his arms and started walking to the Inn. He'd find them some rooms for the night. By the time he reached it she'd stopped crying. He could hear her breath catching but the tears seemed to have stopped for now. "Its for the best Gwyn."

It took her a few moments to realise what he'd said. For the best? Why would he say that? "Why?"

"You're young." Her head lifted and she looked at him blankly. "In a few years you'll understand." Something shifted across her face, something Nate recognised as anger.

"Did you tell Alistair to leave me here?"

"No." When she wriggled he dropped her carefully on her feet. "Be sensible Gwyn, you're a child. In a few years." Nate stopped when she shoved a finger in his chest.

"You should know better. Your father did it to you. Now you're doing it to me."

"Its not the same. This is for your own good."

"My own good! Andraste's tits Nate! Listen to yourself." Gwyn felt good getting that off her chest. "I'm leaving with Alistair. I love him."

"You love him?" Rubbing a hand cross his face, Nate wondered if he'd done something incredibly stupid. "Does he love you?"

"I don't know. He might one day."

Yes, definitely something stupid. "I didn't want you hurt. Alistair didn't want you hurt."

"Alistair won't hurt me. This is hurting me." She could just run, he might chase her, he might not. Gwyn preferred if Nate let her go. "I want to go with him."

"You don't even know where he's going."

"It doesn't matter. Please Nate, let me go."

"Go." This time when she threw herself into his arms it was to hug him. "I'm sorry Gwyn. Blame my need to protect you."

"I understand." Pausing she grinned at him cheekily. "Papa." She'd treasure the memory of his laugh for a long time. "I'll miss you ser." With that she ran back the way they'd come and on towards the docks.

They were pulling the gangplank when Gwyn finally reached the docks. "Hold! Hold for me!"

"Cursed elves." The sailors ignored the boatswain's swearing and slowed their work, hoping she'd make it in time.

Just as her feet hit the wooden dock the plank was pulled in. "Cursed shems!" Running as fast as she could she waited until the last possible inch and launched herself across the space and onto the ship.

Unable to stop her momentum she ran into something hard that knocked the wind out of her. "Sorry ser.

"I'll live." Alistair put her back on her feet. "I thought I told you to go home."

"So you did." Looking around she saw where he'd put his pack and dropped hers next to it. "Where are we off to, if I may ask?"

"The Anderfels. Weisshaupt. I'm told the First Warden knows where every Warden in Thedas is. I have one I want to find."

"Your mother?"

"My mother." Feeling her hand slip into his he glanced down at her. "I'm glad you're here Gwyn." Hadn't he known if she followed him he'd have to keep her? There'd be time later to find out why she'd come after he'd told her to go. Time for him to deal with his conscience as best he could. "I think, considering everything, you should probably call me Alistair."

"Yes Alistair, ser."


	11. Across the Waking Sea

Alistair leaned on the ship's rail and watched the dolphins jump alongside. "I knew someone from Antiva."

"Someone? A woman, someone?" Gwyn smiled when he let out a loud laugh. "No?"

"No. A man, an assassin." Turning he leaned back and pictured Zev. "You'd like him." Giving her a look he grinned. "He likes to tie people up."

Gwyn thought that was an odd thing to want to do. "Why would he want to do that?"

"Ah." Reminding himself sternly that Gwyn was young and surprisingly innocent, Alistair shook his head. "Zevran was an odd man. A Crow."

"A bird?" This person sounded stranger by the second. "How could he be a bird?"

"An elf who is a Crow." He should explain properly, pity because her increasingly confused expression was hilarious. "The Crows is the name of an order of assassins in Antiva. They're very powerful, or so I've been told. Repeatedly."

"Oh." That made a bit more sense, she supposed.

"I'm surprised Oghren didn't mention him." Unless the dwarf had changed, a lot, he'd loved to hear the sound of his own voice.

"I don't talk to him much. He's a Warden."

"And?" Alistair wasn't sure how that was relevant. "You seemed to know Anders quite well." Not to mention Howe, which he wasn't going to. Ever.

"Anders is." Gwyn blinked. What was Anders? "Anders. He's different."

"I'll say." He grinned when she rolled her eyes. "Zevran was hired to kill me, us, Caethes and me. During the Blight."

"He tried to kill you!"

"Tried, my dear, tried. A very poor try at that." When she put her hand over his he smiled down at her.

"There. See that." The man who'd watched them talking nudged his companion. "Told you."

"I see." This could change things a bit. "You were right then. There's just the two of them. One of them goes missing, who's to help them? Word is they're running away from Ferelden. Won't know anyone in Antiva."

"You know this, how?"

"Heard the man ask where the ship was heading. Got on the first one leaving apparently, didn't ask until we'd left port."

"Perfect then."

"Perfect." He studied them for a moment longer. "Should fetch a decent price in the markets."

. . .

Gwyn watched Alistair pace the room. "Why did you get on the ship if it wasn't going where you wanted to be?"

"I'd rather not say." It was times like these he was sorry he'd spent most of the journey convincing her not to think of him as her commanding officer. "If you don't mind."

"Is it embarassing?"

Stopping near the window, Alistair peered out. "Oh, look, the market. All those merchants selling, things. We need things don't we?"

Gwyn stood. "I'd like to see the markets."

"See them? Not buy anything?"

"Anything we buy we have to carry." After checking her daggers and bow, she was ready to leave. Alistair was still standing near the window staring at her. "Something wrong?"

"Are you sure you're a woman?" Suddenly realising how that might sound he quickly added. "Oh, I mean, just, that you don't want to shop, not that you don't look like a woman. You do! Really."

After giving him a moment to stop spluttering, Gwyn smirked. "I haven't heard you complaining. Ser."

There it was, her sense of humour. Still a rare event it took him a moment to realise she'd made a joke. "And you won't. Ever. Now, if you're finished torturing me, shall we look at the markets?"

"Look. No buying."

"Yes ser." That smirk was hard to resist, so he didn't and pressed a quick kiss to it. "No buying."

. . .

"They're well made arrows. I've never seen arrows this well made."

"Ah huh."

"I had to buy them." Gwyn shifted the bundle of arrows in her arms and tried not to look guilty. "They'll be useful."

"Ah huh."

"I'll put them in the room for now." She waited for Alistair's nod before turning. "You'll wait here for me?"

"Right here ser." He enjoyed the glance she threw over her shoulder before marching away. "Whatever you say ser." Alister wondered if he could convince her to be that bossy later. That could be fun.

"See there. Told if you if we waited long enough they'd separate. Now wait until she's out of his sight first. Then we'll have to be quick." Nudging his companion he pointed over to the side where the shadows made an excellent hiding place.

Gwyn refused to feel guilty for buying arrows. They would need them, particularly ones as finely made as these. Recalling what Alistair had told her about the Crows, she wondered if all the weapons in Antiva were fine because so many of them seemed to be assassins?

Reminding herself to ask him later, Gwyn tucked the arrows away and wandered back outside to the market. The place they'd agreed to meet was in her sight from the door of the Inn but she couldn't see Alistair anywhere. Wondering if he'd gone off to buy something in secret, she smiled a little and walked over to wait for him.

She didn't start to worry until the sun dipped below the horizon.

. . .

The stall keepers were all closing up for the night and didn't seem interested in helping an elf find her missing companion. When her searching and questions in the market brought no result, Gwyn started feeling desperate. If no one had seen Alistair, or refused to say that they had, that could mean someone had taken him.

She didn't know anyone here to ask for help. _She_ didn't know anyone, but Alistair did. Alistair knew someone powerful. Scanning the fast darkening streets she spotted a well lit window. A tavern. Perfect. Jogging over to it, she pushed the door open and marched up to the bartender.

He didn't seem too impressed to find a lone elf in his tavern, but probably decided money was money and nodded to her. When he spoke to her in Antivan she shook her head.

"Do you speak Ferelden?"

After a shrug he nodded. "What do you want?"

Gwyn pushed a gold coin across the counter to him. "Information."

Gile straightened. An elf, in armour, with gold. He knew what that might mean. "About?"

"I'm looking for someone. An elf. A Crow."

"A. Crow! By the Maker. That is a dangerous thing."

"His name is Zevran." Gwyn watched him slide the coin back towards her.

"No. Now please to leave." Gile might not know this one, but he knew women and knew what that firmed jaw meant. "Begone girl. I know nothing of these Crows or this Zevran."

"Please. I need to find him."

"No! Go!"

She sighed when he walked to the other end of the bar and refused to look at her again. There must be more taverns down here, she'd just try them all until someone would help her.

As soon as the door closed behind her, Gile gestured towards the back of the large room. A few moments later two men appeared. "That elf. She looks for Zevran. I told her nothing."

Without speaking they glanced at each other and nodded. Gile swallowed nervously when, equally silently, they glided out into the night.

Gwyn found five more taverns but none of the Innkeepers wanted to help her. They all said the same thing. They'd never heard of the Crows or Zevran. Alistair had said he was an assassin, so it was possible he was dead she supposed. It was more likely they knew but were afraid to tell her.

What was she going to do if she couldn't find him? Ask the guards for help?

She may only have been in Antiva for a day but Gwyn knew better than to think they'd help her. It was the Crows or nothing. Lost in thought she wandered into an alley and found it was a dead end.

"You ask questions. Why?"

Spinning she found her way out blocked by three men. All armed. "I'm not wanting to cause trouble. Just find Zevran."

"Why?"

"I was travelling with a Grey Warden. He's gone, disappeared from the market. He told me about Zevran. I thought perhaps, he'd help me." None of these men was an elf. Which meant she hadn't found Zevran.

"Help you? Why would the Crows help you? Do you have gold?"

"Not much. I thought, Alistair said Zevran was his friend." The men looked at each other then back at her. "Would you ask him? Please?"

"We'll ask nothing." To emphasise that, he unsheathed his weapons. "You will die and there will be an end to it."

Gwyn didn't try to reason with them. That would be pointless. Instead she quickly unhooked her bow and notched an arrow. One she could kill at range, the others would close too quickly. Even as she planned it out, an arrow flew from her bow, striking one of her attackers in the throat. Two left. As she'd expected they didn't pause but came at her fast.

Replacing her bow, she gathered herself and ran towards them. Just as she reached them she leapt into the air and flipped over their heads. Once past them, Gwyn ran and kept running.

She couldn't defeat both of them in close combat and Gwyn saw no disgrace in running away.

"Stop." The two surviving Crows jerked to a halt. "Quite a nimble little thing, no?"

"She'll get away."

"We know which Inn she is staying at, yes? It will take time for her to find it again and gather her things. I believe I can reach it before she leaves." Walking over to the still body in the road, he nudged it with his foot. "Nice shot. Clean. Hard into the throat."

"We didn't think she would be this dangerous."

"No. You didn't. You underestimated your target." Smiling a little he nudged the body again. "That can be a costly mistake."

"Master."

"She tells you she travels with a Grey Warden. A Grey Warden who is known to me and yet you don't allow her to speak. Instead you attack." Turning to look over shoulder at them, Zev could see the fear they were trying to suppress. This was his fault. He should have brought more experienced people. These were still training. Still learning. "Go home. We will speak of this later."

Knowing they'd do as he'd told them, Zev nudged the body a final time. "Dispose of this first."

Leaving them, he strolled slowly along the road, thinking about what he'd learned. The woman, name as yet unknown, had been asking about him and Crows at the Taverns near the market. Until she'd mentioned Alistair's name he would have been happy to let the men kill her.

He'd left Alistair in Denerim. Married to Anora and seemingly settled ruling Ferelden. What had happened since then? Why was he travelling in Antiva with a lone elf for company?

Why _had_ he been travelling. It seemed from what the woman had said that Alistair was missing. Another man and Zev would assume he'd simply left. Tired of the woman and unwilling to face possible tears when he told her so.

Not Alistair, never Alistair. Which meant that he had been taken from the market against his will. That was, disturbing.

. . .

Gwyn jammed everything into her pack as quickly as she could, then grabbed Alistair's and ran for the door. Thowing it open she found her way blocked.

"Hello."

Dropping both packs she reached for her dagger only to have him hold one hand up to stop her.

"No, no. No need for that. I have no wicked intentions." Zev held his hands up away from his own weapons. "I only wish to talk to you."

He sounded friendly, but she took a few steps back into the room, giving her space if she needed it. He was an elf and dressed in leather armour. "Zevran?"

"Zev, please. You are?"

"Gwyn." She moved even further back when he came in and pushed the door closed. "You sent those men to kill me."

It wasn't a question and he didn't pretend to think it was. "Yes, however, now I have no wicked intentions." He tried a smile but she didn't seem impressed by it. "If you are in truth a friend of Alistair's then you are a friend of mine as well."

"Not a friend, I don't think, we're, well. You know." Usually Gwyn would have no trouble saying what she and Alistair were, something about Zev made her self conscious. "More."

"Ah. Indeed? Alistair is a fortunate man." She flushed which made him smile. "Perhaps you might tell me why you wanted to find me?"

"We were in the markets, I came back here to put some things away I'd bought. When I went back, he was gone. We agreed to meet and he didn't come. He wouldn't leave without me. I know he wouldn't."

"You are correct, Alistair would not abandon you in a strange place."

Gwyn nodded and felt her resolve of the past day dissappearing. "Will you help me find him?"

"Of course."

Now she had help, it was difficult not to let the emotions she'd kept at bay show. She wouldn't. She needed to be strong.

If ever a woman needed to cry it was this one. "Nothing will break if you cry Gwyn. I promise." He held his arms open, she sniffed, then threw herself at him. "That's it." A strong woman this one, strong and not given to tears he'd say. Patting her back he felt slightly envious that during whatever had happened in the past few years, Alistair had a last managed to find someone to love him. Not a beautiful woman perhaps, but those sad eyes of hers would touch the coldest heart and she'd already shown herself loyal.

Crying on and hugging strange men wasn't something Gwyn usually did. Zev was a friend of Alistair's, perhaps that was the difference. He might be an assassin but she felt she could trust him.

Feeling her calming, Zev pushed her a way a little. "Now. You have cried, which is good, you will be calm enough to tell me what happened, yes?"

"Yes." Glancing up quickly she flushed. "Thank you."

"No, thank _you_. Its not often a beautiful woman wants to cuddle me." She flushed even redder but did smile. "There, that's better."

After taking a few breaths, Gwyn sat on the bed. "What do we do?"

"First we must find who has taken Alistair. It must be taken I think, I know of no reason that would cause him to leave you here."

"Who would take him?"

"Slavers." He held his hand up to stop her. "You are about to object that Alistair is a grown man and not a child. This is more difficult to manage I agree, however, some, customers, have particular requirements that are best met by an adult."

Gwyn was almost afraid to ask. "What kind of requirements?"

"Many. Most commonly a breeding or sexual need and occasionally they enjoy watching their slaves fight to the death." Zev considered it. "It is more difficult than you would imagine to find human males in good health and trained to fight. Most would have family or comrades to look for them. Alistair would appear to have only you. This makes him an attractive target."

"He's a Grey Warden."

"You and I know that my dear, the slavers do not. We can only hope they don't find out or they may kill him to cover their tracks. Angering the Wardens is not usually considered a good way to extend your life."


End file.
